Definitions by IsraelHands09
Excreat
The act in which one consumes food whilst taking a dump, often because the individual is in a hurry and does not have the time to do both one at a time. Not to be confused with excrete.
"Shit I don't have time to eat this and take a dump! I need to get to class and take that exam. Guess it's time to excreat."
Further examples: College Students...me.
Further examples: College Students...me.
Excreat by IsraelHands09 October 7, 2010
SafeTGard twat
The one person who walks into the bathroom that is a total germophobe about toilet seats. So to subdue their fears, they use "SafeTGard" toilet seat covers, often leaving them there when they're done for the pending shitter to have to sweep off the toilet seat.
Husband walking out of the bathroom:
Wife: "Hey honey, did you have a nice shit?"
Husband: "Well, I would have if those damn SafeTGard twats would learn to clean up after themselves."
Wife: "Hey honey, did you have a nice shit?"
Husband: "Well, I would have if those damn SafeTGard twats would learn to clean up after themselves."
SafeTGard twat by IsraelHands09 October 1, 2010
Engineer
You: "Hey, wait here, I'mma go take a dump."
Friend: "Alright."
*5 minutes later*
Friend: "Dude..I was playing guitar with your amp and I noticed a parasitic capacitance between the output and the input, causing parasitic oscillation. So I really quickly soldered them a little further from eachother, so it shouldn't have any feedback anymore."
You: "Oh...uhhh... thanks?"
Friend: "Hey, I'm an engineer. It's what I do."
Friend: "Alright."
*5 minutes later*
Friend: "Dude..I was playing guitar with your amp and I noticed a parasitic capacitance between the output and the input, causing parasitic oscillation. So I really quickly soldered them a little further from eachother, so it shouldn't have any feedback anymore."
You: "Oh...uhhh... thanks?"
Friend: "Hey, I'm an engineer. It's what I do."
Engineer by IsraelHands09 September 18, 2010
Toshallucination
This occurs when an individual is in the kitchen or somewhere away from their Television and they hear a voice on the TV that sounds distinctly similar to that of Daniel Tosh, the host of the funny-as-hell video clip show Tosh.o. Thus, out of sheer instinct, the individual will run to his/her television in dissapointment to find that it is just some guy on 50 Star Stand-Up Weekend.
Man, last night I've been having mad Toshallucinations like every ten minutes. I was barely able to get any fucking sleep!
Toshallucination by IsraelHands09 July 7, 2010