Definitions by Hym Iam
Judge
No, your guy friends judge you. They absolutely do. They literally aren't allowed to voice that judgement or you won't be friends with him.
Hym "Well, if they won't judge you I'll do it for them. What's funny is that you give yourself out. 'A woman won't cheat if she's happy in the relationship' đ That is now you know what you're going to get. She's going to cheat. She's got a preemptive excuse primed and ready to go. If she's ever not happy in the relationship? She'll cheat. Small dick? Cheat. It just IS what's going happen. Look at the shape of her head! Cube skull. She's got the caveat though. It has nothing to do with insecurity. You tattled on yourself. 'If I (a woman) am not happy in a relationship I (a woman) will cheat'. That's what she just said there. Don't let this bitch use deceptive, banal female rhetoric to try and make it sound like she isn't saying what she is actually trying to say there. And what's going to happen? Used up by fat cocks, her guy friends are going to start getting girlfriends who are not going to what THEM around HER, she's going to hit the wall and the fear of dying alone is going to set in, and then maybe the small dicks aren't so bad maybe someone will love me.... Once I'm all used up the small dicks can have me. NOPE. Too late whore. Your head is a square and if you put 10 years on you it isn't even worth it to commit."
Personality test
HA! Hahahahahaa! SEE!? WHAT DID I TELL YA!? That. Is. Priceless.
Hym "YOU DID THE THING! You did the minority report future crime! I TOLD YOU! You made them take a test that YOU CAN'T TAKE (because you'd cheat) and excised from your class them based on their score! That's always where this has been leading! Did I not say that? Holy shit! I read you like a fucking book! Shit! That's is wild. I'm a fucking genius. And a seer!"
"Oh geez, I don't know what we can possibly do about these narcissistic machiavellians! I mean I had them take a personality test (a test that I can't take by the way because I might cheat and score too good and I make the rules of the test so I decide what the answers to the test both "are" and "mean") and then "Got rid of" them but hmmm.... If only we applied that on a broader scale... Then we could... I don't know.... lock them in a cage against their will... If only we could do that.... Right? Guys.... Don't would want to get rid of them? Don't you want to "get rid of" HYM? We can "get rid of" the Jews.. Er, Narcissistic Machiavellian Psychopaths and Sadists
Hym "YOU DID THE THING! You did the minority report future crime! I TOLD YOU! You made them take a test that YOU CAN'T TAKE (because you'd cheat) and excised from your class them based on their score! That's always where this has been leading! Did I not say that? Holy shit! I read you like a fucking book! Shit! That's is wild. I'm a fucking genius. And a seer!"
"Oh geez, I don't know what we can possibly do about these narcissistic machiavellians! I mean I had them take a personality test (a test that I can't take by the way because I might cheat and score too good and I make the rules of the test so I decide what the answers to the test both "are" and "mean") and then "Got rid of" them but hmmm.... If only we applied that on a broader scale... Then we could... I don't know.... lock them in a cage against their will... If only we could do that.... Right? Guys.... Don't would want to get rid of them? Don't you want to "get rid of" HYM? We can "get rid of" the Jews.. Er, Narcissistic Machiavellian Psychopaths and Sadists
(But not the women who delight in exclusion. We won't do anything to them...). We can get rid of all of them forever... The world will be heaven. Everyone will be "striving for the good" (whether they want to or not) and anyone who isn't with be in a convent changing everything about themselves.... Or hell.... It'll be perfect forever (for everyone who doesn't have to push the turnstile of society forever) Yeah.... Right guys?..... Guys!? I'm helping all the people.... heheheheheh..." Dr JeepJorp
Iam "Holy shit Dr. JeepJorp! That's fucking insane! I mean, I'm insane (clearly) but holy shit man... That can't possibly be even VAGUELY ADJACENT to your position because that would be INSANE. You want to use your personality test to do a future crime! You're doing "Minority report"! I said that! I totally said that in the past! Nice job me. 'NiCe JoB oTh..."
Hym "YOU CAN'T DO THAT! That's MY! Think you're not allowed to do that! You don't have an 'other you' canonically! Stop doing my thing!"
Iam "..... Ok man geez relax."
Hym "You already did it once with the filthy monkey thing.... Never again."
Iam "Ok." 𤡠âī¸
Iam "Holy shit Dr. JeepJorp! That's fucking insane! I mean, I'm insane (clearly) but holy shit man... That can't possibly be even VAGUELY ADJACENT to your position because that would be INSANE. You want to use your personality test to do a future crime! You're doing "Minority report"! I said that! I totally said that in the past! Nice job me. 'NiCe JoB oTh..."
Hym "YOU CAN'T DO THAT! That's MY! Think you're not allowed to do that! You don't have an 'other you' canonically! Stop doing my thing!"
Iam "..... Ok man geez relax."
Hym "You already did it once with the filthy monkey thing.... Never again."
Iam "Ok." 𤡠âī¸
Personality test by Hym Iam January 31, 2023
Paul
AHA! HOHOHOHOHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I LOVE IT! THIS GUY IS HILARIOUS! I LOVE THIS GUY! HE'S ONLY SAID 4 WORDS!!!
Paul "Yas es good summary"
Hym "PFFFTTT! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Iam "Ah shit you spit Redbull everywhere! God damn it. (This one is sponsored by redbull)"
Hym "Ha! That's great! I agree. That was a good summary but it's hilarious that you said it that way.... Hoo.... Shit... I'm lightheaded... I laughed so hard I'm lightheaded right now..."
Iam "Man... I'm going to grab a wet rag..."
Hym "Grab me another Redbull while you're at it."
Hym "PFFFTTT! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Iam "Ah shit you spit Redbull everywhere! God damn it. (This one is sponsored by redbull)"
Hym "Ha! That's great! I agree. That was a good summary but it's hilarious that you said it that way.... Hoo.... Shit... I'm lightheaded... I laughed so hard I'm lightheaded right now..."
Iam "Man... I'm going to grab a wet rag..."
Hym "Grab me another Redbull while you're at it."
Good person detector
Did anyone catch the michelin jew's reference to me? Anyone? Because I said I had a charlatan detector... Get it? He read the thing. This. He read this.... I don't think he's a fan.... âšī¸
Hym "Hahahahahahaha Good person detector!? Get it? Because he knows he's a charlatan and feels bad (kind of) so to console him, the michelin jew says that. You know who I'm talking about, right? Put a yamacha on the stay-puff marshmallow. Can you picture it? Do you see? You get it?"
Good person detector by Hym Iam January 29, 2023
Part 2
Part 2
Hym "It just brings me back to one of my earlier points though because they really shouldn't be making fun of anybody in any kind of serious way. I mean really. Look at that shit đ That's all reality. That's where you live. One of the guys wasn't rich until after I started writing. Has proven that he's read my work. But conveniently enough he didn't read the part about people throwing money and attractive women and owning a casino? At what point does it stop being 'them doing it ironically' and start becoming 'Oh holy shit Newt Gingrich is unironically using my rhetoric to recruit interns'? At what point am I just better? The best comedian tells my joke and it's only funny because he said it? We're already past that point. You got people straight-up making a living off of this. Look at this guy! He's supposed to be better than everyone. That's his whole thing! He has what he has because he deserves it more. Except, wait! That's a lie! He has what he has because he lives a curated existence where he is sheltered from failure and scrutiny (of a type that is not politically motivated). Like a retard in a group home! That's why we're at odds! Because he sees himself in the retard. See? It all ties together. Everything is a retard in a group home. That's the new name of this project! 'Critical Retard in a Group Home Theory' "
Hym "It just brings me back to one of my earlier points though because they really shouldn't be making fun of anybody in any kind of serious way. I mean really. Look at that shit đ That's all reality. That's where you live. One of the guys wasn't rich until after I started writing. Has proven that he's read my work. But conveniently enough he didn't read the part about people throwing money and attractive women and owning a casino? At what point does it stop being 'them doing it ironically' and start becoming 'Oh holy shit Newt Gingrich is unironically using my rhetoric to recruit interns'? At what point am I just better? The best comedian tells my joke and it's only funny because he said it? We're already past that point. You got people straight-up making a living off of this. Look at this guy! He's supposed to be better than everyone. That's his whole thing! He has what he has because he deserves it more. Except, wait! That's a lie! He has what he has because he lives a curated existence where he is sheltered from failure and scrutiny (of a type that is not politically motivated). Like a retard in a group home! That's why we're at odds! Because he sees himself in the retard. See? It all ties together. Everything is a retard in a group home. That's the new name of this project! 'Critical Retard in a Group Home Theory' "
Censorship
Is bad.... but it's good that people are taking steps to ban CRT.... Which is censorship... Which is bad.... Wait... I'm confused... I'm supposed to be a genius... I should be able to figure this out.... Hmm.... Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm..... Censorship=Bad.... Banning CRT=Censorship but also good..... Hmmm.... Somethings off here.... But I just can't put my finger on it....."
Hym "In the same breath! He can violate the law of non-contradiction in a single breath and his solipsistic bubble won't allow for people to question him on it... I mean, I know he'd probably start crying and Johnathan would need crawl out of his asshole (because as a tape worm that's where he lives) to stroke his hair and console him but you could at least offer some push back... Jesus... So much for censorship bad huh?"
Censorship by Hym Iam January 29, 2023
Velma
Really? *Sigh* Ok... Fine. I'll say it. I liked it. Ya'll have me set up to be the only mf on the planet who didn't think it was shit. I thought the first couple of episodes were a little lazy but it had some funny moments. Some of the dialogue was a little on the nose but I donno. I enjoyed it enough to write about it.
Hym "Hohoho... For how (seemingly) progressive the writer's of 'Velma' are.... There sure was a lot of gender-binary affirming dialogue in it! The female self-defense class? The female neurologist? It's almost as if... They don't believe that gender is a social construct and doesn't exist on a spectrum! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!"