Hym Iam's definitions

Indefensible

Nothing. That's the fundamental presupposition of America's legal system.

Hym "I saw an advertisement for some senators campaign and they said 'My opponent has defended sex offenders and pedophiles' and I'm like... So he was a defense attorney? That's a horribly dishonest way to frame that and maybe if you don't believe in the core tenets of the legal system of a country you shouldn't be getting elected. I mean... You think defense attorneys should just throw cases? Being a defense attorney means you are immoral now? What was he supposed to do? It's preposterous to think that things are selectively indefensible and having to defend them in any context excludes you as a candidate for office."

by Hym Iam March 11, 2023

Parents

They've been doing it for years... But they won't acknowledge that they're doing it... Amd they know I have a problem with it... And there are real-world ramifications to them doing it... Doesn't matter. I don't need agency or actionable information. I need to do what I'm told and "try harder" in a vague and abstract sense and I don't need what I want from them.

Hym "Yeah, being a parent doesn't make you better than anyone. Having a kid is (at this point) an entirely optional thing someone let you do and in no way bolsters your moral standing. Nor should it. You are not special or good. Your wife isn't special or good. Parents are shit."

by Hym Iam March 11, 2023

Women

But Jordan.... You think I need to be told what to do and unless I do what you won't associate with me. You literally apply the logic you attribute to the Muslim oligarchs TO YOUNG MEN and are constantly telling that what to do or how to change to be existentially superior to their current self.

Hym "Men shouldn't be shamed for their ambition... They should be shamed for their LACK of ambition. But that's what he does. He only tells half the story and then acts out the rest. And it's not WOMEN who should be watched and controlled.... It's men! It's 'cowardly' to do it to women but if you do it to men it's brave or something... Men need to be better so women can feel better about... Getting slutted out by fat cocks and then marrying you... or something..."

by Hym Iam March 11, 2023

Tabs

Cleared.

Hym "I need to start clearing these tabs and finishing my thoughts. I mean... What if someone openned up my browser? They would uncover my secret identity! Oh wait everyone know who I am..."

by Hym Iam March 11, 2023

You are welcome

I made it a point to remember because I knew that I would be the only one who did. The 15th right? Yep... BETTER THAN EVERYONE!!!!

Hym "You are welcome! I knew no one else would say anything... Sorry 🤷 ♂️ If retard sex cult doesn't get a response I doubt one lone voice would.... Let's get a head count of lives saved. 1 million? 2 billion? Am I the greatest hero of all time? Probably."

by Hym Iam March 12, 2023

Comdey writer

I could totally do that! That would be cool. Dan can produce it and I would totally cast you and katy. She has a great voice.

Hym "I could totally do that! Comdey writer sounds like fun."

by Hym Iam March 12, 2023

You

Nope. That's why I use YOU (as an abstraction and in aggregate). I know you're practically a bald cripple so I'll explain it to you. YOU as "an abstraction" means "As an idea that represents someone who thinks what you purport to think" and "in aggregate" YOU" as a part of a group". You follow? Because it's unlikely that you're the only one who thinks what you think. I don't purport to know you at an interpersonal level. That's why I use "You as an abstraction and in aggregate" It's implicit (or impliket as Jordan likes to say) in the explanation.

Bald cripple "I don't care motherfucker"

Hym "I know! I don't care that you don't care! Since you like to remind me of the shit I said: Remember how I said that the age difference between you and your wife is the same as the difference between me and you daughter and that if I'm a pedo than so are you? That's hilarious! They got to be getting up there in age by now, huh? You think their boyfriends are going to do the thing? "I AM HYM!!!!" Right? Did they already do it? Are the hammer clowns going to come for them? I hope not. I would hate for that to happen."

Bald cripple "Now you know how the retard feels."

Hym "No. I don't. Because I didn't fuck Kendra M- Wait... Do you already know who she is? Does everyone? Should I say it? Nah... I won't say it... Heheheheheh... Somebody mentioned something about a contractual obligation to not mention me. It figures Youtube is owned by a woman. Hey, remember when you cried like a bitch after someone made that Nigger-guy compilation? Because you though you were going to loses everything? What do you think is going to happen to you if the half of the country that hates you decides to use this against you? How inextricably linked are we? You should seriously think about doing some of my jokes in your next set. Everybody who does it seems to kill with it and get positive coverage because I'm an objectively better comedian then you and a genius and a quasi-deity. Isn't that wild? That I can just be that must better than you in spite of all you hard work? Rendered completely meaningless. Just like a whore fucking a retard instead of you. All that hard work down the drain... Oh well I guess. Hey, give me a sign when they do the thing I need to make sure my minions are 'on it'. You know? Kay I love you buhbye!"

by Hym Iam March 12, 2023