Definitions by H.S. Willsy
Kurt Cobrained
When someone gets wasted to the point that there brains are literally no longer in their skull, they are Kurt Cobrained.
"Ah, fuck! This kid on the sofa's Kurt Cobrained man!"
"What?"
"His brains are all external to his skull and shit!"
"Ahhh! Fuck! Put a lamp shade over his head or something!"
"Ahhh! Okay, there we go. Now what?"
"Now we warm these Pot Noodles up."
"What?"
"His brains are all external to his skull and shit!"
"Ahhh! Fuck! Put a lamp shade over his head or something!"
"Ahhh! Okay, there we go. Now what?"
"Now we warm these Pot Noodles up."
Kurt Cobrained by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
Radio Foured
When someone is completely sober and doing something dull whilst all their friend are out partying, they are radio foured.
"Where were you last night?"
"Radio foured."
"Doing what?"
"I had to go to my girlfriend's grandma's ninety fifth birthday party. What did you get up to?"
"We were snorting comedown-free drugs off naked porn stars for a bit and then we got kebabs."
*SIGHS*
"Radio foured."
"Doing what?"
"I had to go to my girlfriend's grandma's ninety fifth birthday party. What did you get up to?"
"We were snorting comedown-free drugs off naked porn stars for a bit and then we got kebabs."
*SIGHS*
Radio Foured by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
The Pregnancy Craving Shield
When pregnant women eat junk food with no positive nutritional qualities and claim that it's a craving, they're using the pregnancy craving shield.
"Could you go out and get me another two bags of chips? And a deep fried pizza slice?"
"Really?"
"I'M CRAVING IT!"
"Jesus, put the pregnancy craving shield down already. I'll get it for you. Just stop looking at me like I'm a man-sized chicken leg."
"Really?"
"I'M CRAVING IT!"
"Jesus, put the pregnancy craving shield down already. I'll get it for you. Just stop looking at me like I'm a man-sized chicken leg."
The Pregnancy Craving Shield by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
UD Wooing
The act of using Urban Dictionary to impress the object of your desire by listing their first name with a definition that's somewhere along the lines of:
X is the most amazing girl in the world, she is really pretty and amazing and she was kind to an animal and when she smile it light up all of the world and she would make anyone fall in love with her because she is amazing and I am lucky to know her and I thank god every day for making such an amazing girl and hope please that she on love with me also.
Almost certainly doesn't get these dweebs the sex they think it will.
X is the most amazing girl in the world, she is really pretty and amazing and she was kind to an animal and when she smile it light up all of the world and she would make anyone fall in love with her because she is amazing and I am lucky to know her and I thank god every day for making such an amazing girl and hope please that she on love with me also.
Almost certainly doesn't get these dweebs the sex they think it will.
"Hey X, have a look at this what I have done for you."
"Err...are you UD wooing me you fucking mong?"
"...no?"
"Die. Die now. Kill yourself while I watch and eat these Doritos."
"Okay..."
"Err...are you UD wooing me you fucking mong?"
"...no?"
"Die. Die now. Kill yourself while I watch and eat these Doritos."
"Okay..."
UD Wooing by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
Prevert
A prevert is a person who pre-empts a pervert by doing to the pervert what they would have done to them, e.g. when a ballerina takes an illicit sniff of a foot fetishists loafer or when a child rapes a paedophile
"Mrs. Robinson? Mrs. Robinson? Hi, I'm sorry to have to tell you this but your son Billy molested me last night. Molested me badly."
"Oh my god! Billy did?"
"Yes I'm afraid so."
"Hey, wait a minute, aren't you that paedophile that just moved into the area?"
"Err...yeah...Frank's the name. But I didn't initiate anything, I swear to god."
"Oh that's just mummy's little prevert taking matters into his own hands. I mean, you would have done it to him wouldn't you? Wouldn't you pervert?"
"Yeah...yeah I suppose I would."
"You have to wake up pretty early in the morning to surprise my Billy!"
"Oh my god! Billy did?"
"Yes I'm afraid so."
"Hey, wait a minute, aren't you that paedophile that just moved into the area?"
"Err...yeah...Frank's the name. But I didn't initiate anything, I swear to god."
"Oh that's just mummy's little prevert taking matters into his own hands. I mean, you would have done it to him wouldn't you? Wouldn't you pervert?"
"Yeah...yeah I suppose I would."
"You have to wake up pretty early in the morning to surprise my Billy!"
Prevert by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
Preversions
Preversions are acts commited by preverts, i.e. people who preempt the actions of perverts by doing to a pervert what a pervert would have done to them.
"So what preversions do we know of Inspector?"
"Well there's the reverse jackson, the funky trap, the shepherd's delight and the razorblade romance."
"Nasty stuff, nasty stuff."
"Yes. Beware of the prevert perverts, beware!"
"Well there's the reverse jackson, the funky trap, the shepherd's delight and the razorblade romance."
"Nasty stuff, nasty stuff."
"Yes. Beware of the prevert perverts, beware!"
Preversions by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
Funky Trap
A form of preversion. Involves inviting a group of foot fetishistists to a house in which shoes must be removed to gain entry. They'll all come assuming that they can sneak away at some point to have an illicit sniff of the shoes left by the door. However, what actually happens is you steal the shoes while they are in the other room and take them away for a horrible sniffing.
"Shoes?!? Where are the goddamn shoes?"
"You after the shoes too?"
"I was after the shoes, was everybody after the shoes?"
"Fuck! It's a funky trap!"
See preversions and prevert
"You after the shoes too?"
"I was after the shoes, was everybody after the shoes?"
"Fuck! It's a funky trap!"
See preversions and prevert
Funky Trap by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011