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H.S. Willsy's definitions

Insane Stunt Bonus Award Committee

The panel of judges that attach a monetary reward to insane stunts performed by reckless vehicleists. Points are rewarded for:

height, length, helicopters taken down, hoes annihilated, hoes impregnated, pimps flattened, homages to Scarface made, police evaded, FBI humiliated, single file rows of, "Gouranga," shouting Hare Krishnas ploughed down, cars exploded, tanks exploded, rescue services exploded and pedestrians splattered.

The committee is currently comprised of Pope Ratzenberger, Kermit the Frog, Tinky Winky, Jerry Bruckheimer and Ringo Starr
"I came off my motorbike the other day and totally splodged a load of old ladies and the Insane Stunt Bonus Award Committee gave me £300!"

"Nice. I only got £30 last week when I accidentally reversed over that penguin."

"You probably wouldn't have got anything if it hadn't have been so endangered."

"Flightless birds are dumb."
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
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Sand Crabbing

Sidling crab-like whilst simultaneously making a high pitched, "w00p w00p w00p w00p," noise.
"Did you see Zoidberg sand crabbing on Futurama last night?"

"No, I had to slay that dragon-witch didn't I."

"Dragon-witch?"

"It's a dragon with the powers of a witch. Or it was anyway. Now it's just 18 tonnes of value to premium grade dog food."
by H.S. Willsy August 27, 2011
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Getting Horsey

To 'get horsey' is to take ketamine
"We getting horsey tonight mate?"

"Again? I dunno man, I keep losing my shoes and I've only got this pair left."
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
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Giger Wanker

A Giger Wanker is someone who straps themselves to a ceiling whilst wearing a gas mask and then proceeds to masturbate to a slide show of H.R. Giger paintings. Traditionally they will mutter, "this is normal, this is normal," to themselves until they cum when they will shout, "take that sexual perversion!"
"Why is every guy I meet gay, married or a Giger Wanker?"
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
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Dim Toning

Setting your favourite song as your ring tone and then, after months of hearing it over and over again through your phone's bass-hating speakers, growing to hate it through too much repetition
"Isn't this your favourite song?"

"No, I can't stand it anymore. I set it as my ring tone and after four months of hearing just the chorus I cracked."

"Gutted. That's some pretty dim toning on your part."

"Yeah."

"What have you got as your ring tone now?"

"Why are we talking about ring tones?"

"We must just be losers."

"Bastard."
by H.S. Willsy August 27, 2011
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Bunga Bunga Orgy

An orgy that takes place underwater
As the ship finally sank, and the the sharks began to circle as the last of the rescue boats departed, Tony turned to Emma, Lauren and Christine and asked:

"Bunga bunga orgy?"
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
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Penetrateables

Anything that can be penetrated with a penis, including:

vaginas, ani (anuses), mouths, tightly closed armpits, squeezed together breasts, holes in the walls of public toilets, wounds, empty eye sockets, flesh lights, nostrils, ear holes, pushed together feet, warm pies, ripe fruit, bin bags, two-week old corpses, animal cages and sauce bottle with the lids removed.

It should be noted that most of these are not reccomended in any way, shape or form.
"That girl had more penetrateables than a two-week dead pirate."
by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011
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