Gateskeeper's definitions

iMight

The strength that comes from frequent use of apple products. iMight is 60 % of regular might, much the same as the moon's gravity is to the earth's.

I tried to lift a regular sized laptop after using my macbook air for 3 months, but I was unable to. I had the iMight of a flea.

by gateskeeper January 25, 2008

iRiot

The emotional arc that begins with rage against the status quo, global warming, human trafficking, man's inhumanity to man, political corruption, The elimination of Gene Simmons from the Apprentice, etc, and ends with listlessly leaning back in your chair and turning up your Ipod.

MI5 was able to construct a time machine and hatched a plan to prevent the decline of the British Empire. Fully loaded solar powered Nanos would be sent back to Philadelphia in 1773, to New Delhi in 1902, to Dublin in 1910, and to Quebec and Sydney in 1860. Quebec and Sydney were dropped from the plan a few moments later, as no one in the room could think of a reason why they should bother. see also iRiot prevention.

by gateskeeper January 25, 2008

iDo

What all members of the Apple cult must say when they buy their 4th apple product. This effectively marries them to Steve Jobs, be they male or female. Look around. Everyone on their 3rd iPod is actually engaged to Steve Jobs, the iPhone is actually a wedding present. Don't you wonder how the marriage is consummated?

When he checked my profile at the Apple Store, the Mac Concierge walked me down the Aisle and gave me away. I felt warm flush spread all the way to my iNus when I heard myself say "iDo!" The Specialist lowered tried to raise the veil but it got caught on my razor stubble. I didn't mind. I blushed like a schoolgirl.

by gateskeeper January 25, 2008