affluent

1. Wealthy.

2. Drunk, as in under the affluence of inkahol. (Meaning the influence of alcohol, as might be mispronounced when inebriated.) Also associated with the other meaning because either condition (ought to) make your troubles float away.

Give him five shots of whiskey and he's affluent.

by Fearman August 07, 2007

serendipity

Something pleasant or useful found while looking for something else. Inspired by a Persian fairy story, "The Three Princes of Serendip".

I initially wanted to date Moira, but she turned out to be an awful bore and she snorted when she laughed, which I can't stand. She did however get me in touch with a car dealer who makes really cool custom cars, top quality and dirt cheap, three of which I bought within a year. That was a real piece of serendipity.

by Fearman April 09, 2008

boarding school rations

Tiny helpings of food, or revolting quality food. Self-explanatory.

The plaice was three inches long and had a maggot in it. Why are we reduced to these boarding school rations?

by Fearman August 07, 2007

Christopher Walken

Quirky and slightly mental-looking Hollywood actor. Hasn't got nearly as many good roles as he should. Look out for him in David Cronenberg's The Dead Zone, Spielberg's Catch Me if you Can or in the movie of Ian McEwan's The Comfort of Strangers.

Watch out. Here comes a Christopher Walken character.

by Fearman December 17, 2007

wake up! time to die

Expression frequently used when working with a slow working computer. From Leon's line in Blade Runner.

Come on, you useless hunk of plastic and silicon, load the sucker! Hurry up and wake up! time to die!

by Fearman November 24, 2007

Venus

2. Second planet from the sun. Almost the size of Earth. At various points in the two planets' orbits it is visible in Earth's sky as the so-called morning or evening star. A runaway greenhouse effect has generated temperatures at the surface of around 480 degrees Centigrade, under an atmospheric pressure of around 90 bars, equivalent to the water pressure nearly one kilometre under the sea on Earth. Atmosphere mainly carbon dioxide, contains notable amounts of sulphur dioxide. Sulphuric acid virga (rain that re-evaporates in mid-air) falls from cloud deck about 30 miles above the surface. Diameter about 7,500 miles. Most surface features named for historic or mythical women. Various interesting surface features mapped by the Magellan probe's radar technology. Surface gravity 90 percent of that on Earth. No natural satellites. On current theories, Venus may be a portent of future conditions on Earth's surface as the sun brightens in ages to come. It may also serve as a warning of the (relatively modest but still highly undesirable) effects that carbon dioxide emissions by human industry may have on our own planetary environment.

2. The planet's namesake is the ancient Roman goddess of love, sex and beauty. Modelled on the Greek Aphrodite. One thoroughly industrial-strength bodacious babe. Shag her and die ... or die and shag her, whichever. Compare this image with the nature of the planet's surface and ponder that, as Freddie Mercury once put it, love kills.

Venus is looking really nice in the evening sky tonight.

Oh, Venus, please let me have Aurelia Calypyggia in my bed tonight.

by Fearman May 10, 2008

New Killer Weapons

Some new-fangled type of arms that "President" George Bush II tends to worry about a lot, or so he says.

Mah fellow Americans, there is plenny of evidence that Ee-rak, Afghanistan and perhaps Venezuela all have New Killer Weapons.

by Fearman February 24, 2008