Eaton Holgoode's definitions

Elizabeatin’ Collar

When you harness up your old lady with an Elizabethan Collar around her neck and host a multi-male bukkake session and fill that cone to the rim.

We will be doing an Elizabeatin’ Collar on Rachel during this year’s super bowl half time. There’ll be 20’of is so should fill ‘er up good.

by Eaton Holgoode February 1, 2018

Packing the Trunk

Vigorous, pleasurable anal sex.

Roger's girlfriend love's rough,anal sex. She called him at work and told him that she was sitting at home, naked and waiting for him to get there and start Packing the Trunk.

by Eaton Holgoode May 15, 2015

Uncle Spooner

When you spend the night at your cousin’s house and you wake up in the middle of the night being aggressively spooned by your uncle with a little something stiff knocking on your back door.

I thought I was dreaming till I realized I was awake and getting the old uncle spooner.

by Eaton Holgoode January 27, 2018

Slap Fap

Masturbating oneself by slapping the genitals in an aggressive and repeated fashion.

Roger loves the pain and pleasure derived from a goood slap fap.

Mary's pussy was red and swollen after her slap fap.

by Eaton Holgoode April 11, 2017

Velscrot

A condition of the male ball sack aka scrot or scrotum whereby it clings to the inner thighs, possibly even portions of the taint, like Velcro due to excessive sweat and moisture.

After a long day of yard work, Carl had the worst case of Velscrot when he finally stopped to drink a cold beer.

by Eaton Holgoode November 15, 2015

Broken Jaw

Receving head that does not result in busting a nut. Oral copulation only without orgasm.

May be a result of limp dick, bad oral skills of the giver, impotence, getting interrupted, etc.

Rachel sucked me last night but she’s so bad at it I only got broken jaw.

My mom walked in on Tina and I and let’s just say it ended with broken jaw.

I was so drunk and limp last night Carla could only give me broken jaw.

by Eaton Holgoode February 17, 2018

Cloaked Meat

Cloaked Meat is a situational condition that impacts those who consider themselves to be vegan, vegetarian or simply do not eat animal meat products. Cloaked Meat is when an animal meat product is either purposely or accidently placed into a food entree to be served and eaten by a non-meat eater. Cloaked Meat is most often, but not always, discovered in wraps and sandwiches that are marked as meatless or vegetarian found at catered lunch meetings and functions. The meat is considered Cloaked due to the fact that it is not readily visible to the eye and is often buried under lettuce and other customary sandwich fixings. Even more difficult to spot is Cloaked Meat in baked and cooked entrees. Cloaked Meat is usually only discovered once bitten into and most often, when already swallowed. Depending upon aversion to meat products, Cloaked Meat can result in nausea, vomiting, stomach ache and in extreme instances, massive, explosive diarrhea.

Roxy attended the office's get together for Henry's pending retirement. The company provided a lovely catered lunch which included sandwiches and wraps from a local deli. Roxy selected the sandwich marked "vegetarian wrap" since she is averse to eating animal meat products. Halfway through her sandwich and during a mid-chew and swallow, Roxy discovered that there was Cloaked Meat. Within minutes, Roxy was overwhelmed with nausea and had to leave the party. Within the hour, Roxy found herself running to the bathroom to avoid a shart and she subsequently expelled explosive diarrhea.

by Eaton Holgoode March 7, 2014