Eaton Holgoode's definitions

Crust-Holer

Anal sex with dirty partners.

John is a total crust-holer. He will Plug anyone willing to put their ass up.

by Eaton Holgoode March 10, 2017

Fluff Wank

A quick wank of the cock performed to move the penis from a flaacid or semi-hard state to full on erection for penetration.

During foreplay with Rachel, Roger only achieved a semi so she gave him a quick fluff wank and got it so hard a cat couldn’t scratch it.

by Eaton Holgoode January 6, 2018

Assnanigans

Sexual Shenanigans whereby a male intends to perform anal sex on his unexpecting partner and does so my Tom Foolery and leads his partner to beleive that the occurance of the unexpected anal sex penetration was merely the direct result of a result of cockslippage.

Howard couldn't wait to have a little bit of his girlfriend's Brown Eye so he pulled of a little Assnanigans and slipped out mid-stroke making Sonja squeal with delight.

Roger: Hey Carl. How was your date with Rhonda last night?
Carl: Oh it was good Brahhhh! I pulled some Assnanigans!
Roger: Sweet!

by Eaton Holgoode September 11, 2014

French Flea Market

A group of five or more, disease ridden, toothless prostitutes working the same street corner.

Well since we didn’t score at the bar tonight guess we need to head over to the south side and find tonight French Flea Market. I’ll pay $5 for a hot gummy.

by Eaton Holgoode January 15, 2018

Smoke Hole

A surgically created orifice in the trachea that is most often the result of heavy chain smoking. The stoma, for some people, provides for another available hole for the fucking.

I stuck my penis in Rachel’s smoke hole last night. Bitch couldn’t breath but man it was sure warm and tight.

That prostitute I picked up last night had a smoke hole. For an extra $5 she removed the cover and let me bang that extra fuck hole.

by Eaton Holgoode November 5, 2018

Grundle Grime

Grundle Grime is that greasy, cheesy smelling amalgam of sweat that forms in and around the Grundle area located between the ballsack and anus. May lay dormant and is activated by a scratch or pick of the area and typically transfers to the fingers leavibg a vile, revolting odor.

My fingers smell like grundle grime.

My grundle is so sweaty. I fear to touch it for the grundle grime is intense.

by Eaton Holgoode April 12, 2017

Happy Wipe

The cloth, towel, rag, tissue or even a sock that is used to wipe up post coitus or masturbation cum and love juices. Generally kept in the nightstand or under the bed.

Pass me the happy wipe from under the bed. I need to wipe your spunk off my face before it dries.

Mom: Why are little Johnny's socks always so stiff?

Sister: Because he's using them as a happy wipe now instead of my panties.

by Eaton Holgoode March 24, 2017