7 definitions by Drs. Heather and McNamara

stranglicious

An adjective describing the appeal of a nasty, disgusting, drunk, dirty, stinky serial killer such as Cleveland's own Anthony Sowell. A total douchebag who allegedly raped, murdered, and mutilated more than a dozen women in a crime spree that continued for more than two years after his neighbors reported the odor of rotting corpses coming from his house to the police department.

Anthony Sowell (sipping on a St. Ides 40, speaking from a 2 inch crack in the door): "Hey there Mr. Detective, that nasty smell isn't coming from my apartment! It's coming from the sausage factory across the street!"

Mr. Detective: "Oh, thanks for the clarification Mr. Sowell. You are too stranglicious to be our unsub!"

by Drs. Heather and McNamara June 17, 2011

amygdalitis

An acute inflammation of the amygdala, the emotional center of the brain, usually triggered by being told "no" or being asked to stop playing video games. This is a common psychiatric diagnosis in those who work with children, or adults who spaz out regularly.

Sebastian (age 6):"Nooooooo, I hate you! I'm going to kill myself! I'm going to kill you in your sleep if you don't buy me a new DSi game! I hate you! I wanna die!"

Dr. T Berry Brazelton: "Shit. I think young Sebastian is suffering from an acute case of amygdalitis. Otherwise known as Act a Fool Not Otherwise Specified in the DSM V. This may require an IV infusion of Adderall!"

by Drs. Heather and McNamara March 17, 2011

neglectolator

Any baby-containing device marketed to the masses with the purpose of containing a human infant, usually in developmentally unnatural positions, for the convenience of adults. The amount of time spent in neglectolators restricts the human infant's ability to develop his or her motor skills, and interferes with the ability to develop concentration and the will. Examples of neglectolators include walkers, "exersaucers", jumpers, cribs, strollers, and high chairs. Also, a car seat is considered a neglectolator when it is used in any place besides an automobile.

New Mom #1: "Oh my god, that is the nicest $3000 crib ever! You are soooo lucky to have such generous in-laws!"

New Mom #2: "I know! I love it! I let Gwenivere spend almost every waking moment in her crib, except when I feed her!"

Dr. Mac, walking by: "Total neglectolator. See you in 5 years for her first Adderall script yo."

by Drs. Heather and McNamara July 1, 2011

arga warga

The sound of being gobbled up by two mythological dogs, Folleree and Folleroo, from Russell Hoban's excellent "Riddley Walker."

Ful of the Moon Ful of the Moon,
Ful of the Moon nor dont look back
Folleree Folleroo on your track
Oo hoo hoo Yoop yaroo
Folleree Folleroo follering you
If they catch you in the darga,
Arga Warga

by Drs. Heather and McNamara July 1, 2011

facebook induced mood disorder

A new psychiatric disorder, soon to be released in the DSM V, in which an adolescent becomes suicidal, fakes feeling suicidal, or reports homicidal ideation that is directly related to a series of facebook wall posts from said adolescents love interest, rivals, friends, or enemies. This syndrome often leads to a psychiatric admission, and treatment with Adderall, Lexapro, or both. Sadly.

Resident Doctor Smith: "Well, Connor, what brings you to the psychiatric emergency room today?"

Connor: "I cut my wrists after my ex-girlfriend posted on my wall that she thinks I'm gay, and she's sleeping with my cousin! I hate her! I have no reason to live!"

Resident Doctor Smith: "Connor, you are suffering from facebook induced mood disorder. I am going to admit you to the Adolescent Psychiatry Inpatient Unit. You will need to be stabilized on Adderall and Lexapro, stat. And eat with a spork."

by Drs. Heather and McNamara April 7, 2011

mishugenosis

A yiddish word often used in medicine to describe fakey diseases that exist only in a patient's mind, such as fibromyalgia, tension headaches, restless legs syndrome, irritable bowel syndrome, multiple chemical sensitivity, ambien sleep-eating syndrome, POTS, chronic fatigue syndrome, and any other form of what used to be called neurasthenia.

Louis R: "Oh Doctor Heather, I just cannot function anymore because of my chronic fatigue syndrome in addition to my totally disabling other neurasthenic complaints!"

Doctor Heather: "You know what Louis? I think you suffer from the very rare and deadly Mishugenosis. I am going to fill out your SSI and your Family Medical Leave Act papers right now, because you cannot work any more, not even a desk job! And here is a prescription for Adderall too, it cures everything!"

by Drs. Heather and McNamara April 7, 2011

lactocracy

The philosophy of a governing agency, or leaders of a group of underlings or trainees, whereby the governing agency/leaders deliberately coddle and infantalize the citizens and/or underlings/trainees, based on the assumption that people should never experience any stress, should never stretch themselves in the pursuit of excellence, and should never, essentially, be weaned from the breast. Ever. This is especially prominent among irritating helicopter-parent training directors in psychiatry today.

RLF: "Hey Barb, I am still fuming that the assistant training director sent an email to all the residents telling them to look at other fellowships, and not just ours! What the heck? Why did she do that?"

Barb D: "Well, Bob, you know our reputation for really pushing the residents to become the best they can be. That puts us at odds with the current lactocracy in control of the department. Duh."

by Drs. Heather and McNamara June 17, 2011