Doghouse Riley's definitions
Brown Dogger
A scruffy looking person sitting on a blanket outside a store begging for small change, accompanied as often as not, by a brown dog on the end of a piece of string.
A scruffy looking person sitting on a blanket outside a store begging for small change, accompanied as often as not, by a brown dog on the end of a piece of string.
by Doghouse Riley February 5, 2008
Get the brown doggermug. Entertainers in the public eye, who increasly advertise their particular sexual orientation in public, the more popular they become, are "Playing the gay card."
John Barrymore, who formally was not widely known as a homosexual now uses many opportunities to advertise the fact. He is often "playing the gay card."
Such people and there are many, must have previously believed that their sexual orientation may have been a hinderance in their careers. In reality, it hardly makes any difference to the general public who aren't that bothered. But continual reference to it gets boring.
Such people and there are many, must have previously believed that their sexual orientation may have been a hinderance in their careers. In reality, it hardly makes any difference to the general public who aren't that bothered. But continual reference to it gets boring.
by Doghouse Riley January 12, 2009
Get the playing the gay cardmug. From observation, recognising that the general standard of television in my opinion has deteriorated and continues to do so year by year, so much so I now watch very little, I’ve found as far as the programme quality and content on all television channels, the following Doghouse's Laws of Television often apply.
I started compiling this list several years ago and some of these "laws" are now occasionally mentioned by contributors to a specific TV network message board, though of course they can apply to any channel.
I'm sure other contributors may relate to some of them and can think of other examples of practices which could be added to the list.
With a new programme, if your impression of it after ten minutes is that it's going to be rubbish, you’ll only be right 95% of the time.
The number of advance programme trails screened, will be in inverse proportion to the quality of the programme. The ”best bits” of any programme will be included in the trail.
The volume of background music will often be in inverse proportion to the amount of watchable activity on the screen at that time.
Any TV audience gets the standard of programmes it deserves. It’s no good complaining about the quality of a programme if you continue to watch it.
If an idea for a programme suggested to a TV network commissioning department isn’t another soap in one form or another, or requires an "in your face" presenter/auto-cutie, celebrities, judges, phone votes, or the inclusion of dysfunctional members of the public, it is unlikely to be made.
The number of programme presenters appearing at any one time, will usually be in inverse proportion to the quality of the programme.
The number and variety of similar programmes on TV, are likely to be in inverse proportion to their cost to present.
To reach the widest audience, in a programme where the subject is of a specific nature, it may include totally unrelated elements in an attempt to also “engage” viewers who aren’t the slightest bit interested in the actual topic, in a futile attempt to increase the ratings.
Some programmes, even a few news bulletins, given the level at which the programme makers pitch their production, should have the words; "for Dummies" added to the title.
If you've any doubts about watching a programme, from the trails or advertising you've seen, take a chance, give it a miss.
I started compiling this list several years ago and some of these "laws" are now occasionally mentioned by contributors to a specific TV network message board, though of course they can apply to any channel.
I'm sure other contributors may relate to some of them and can think of other examples of practices which could be added to the list.
With a new programme, if your impression of it after ten minutes is that it's going to be rubbish, you’ll only be right 95% of the time.
The number of advance programme trails screened, will be in inverse proportion to the quality of the programme. The ”best bits” of any programme will be included in the trail.
The volume of background music will often be in inverse proportion to the amount of watchable activity on the screen at that time.
Any TV audience gets the standard of programmes it deserves. It’s no good complaining about the quality of a programme if you continue to watch it.
If an idea for a programme suggested to a TV network commissioning department isn’t another soap in one form or another, or requires an "in your face" presenter/auto-cutie, celebrities, judges, phone votes, or the inclusion of dysfunctional members of the public, it is unlikely to be made.
The number of programme presenters appearing at any one time, will usually be in inverse proportion to the quality of the programme.
The number and variety of similar programmes on TV, are likely to be in inverse proportion to their cost to present.
To reach the widest audience, in a programme where the subject is of a specific nature, it may include totally unrelated elements in an attempt to also “engage” viewers who aren’t the slightest bit interested in the actual topic, in a futile attempt to increase the ratings.
Some programmes, even a few news bulletins, given the level at which the programme makers pitch their production, should have the words; "for Dummies" added to the title.
If you've any doubts about watching a programme, from the trails or advertising you've seen, take a chance, give it a miss.
by Doghouse Riley November 2, 2008
Get the Doghouse's Laws of Television mug. There are too many pathology based crime dramas on TV these days.
All the graphic scenes of body parts can provoke a feeling of nausea making some viewers like myself, forensick.
All the graphic scenes of body parts can provoke a feeling of nausea making some viewers like myself, forensick.
by Doghouse Riley March 8, 2009
Get the Forensickmug. A film or TV drama where innocent people are taken hostage say, in a bank, where the customers are made by the crooks to all lie on the floor in similar fashion to sausages in a pan. Thus a sausage situation.
by Doghouse Riley April 5, 2008
Get the Sausage situationmug. The practice of TV programme producers using one of the same small group of supporting cast actors in different programmes, because they choose "characters" rather than actors, thus there's no time wasted "getting themselves into the part" required.
These actors will play similar characters to that which they played in another recent drama, some as in period dramas, even wearing similar costumes to those they wore before.
It seems that sometimes, as soon as these people "exit stage right" in one drama, round they come again "entering stage left" in something else.
"The Magic Roundabout" is the title of a children's stop-action cartoon series. A roundabout being shown during the opening credits
These actors will play similar characters to that which they played in another recent drama, some as in period dramas, even wearing similar costumes to those they wore before.
It seems that sometimes, as soon as these people "exit stage right" in one drama, round they come again "entering stage left" in something else.
"The Magic Roundabout" is the title of a children's stop-action cartoon series. A roundabout being shown during the opening credits
In the BBC medical series "Bodies" Chrissy Farrell was seen each week as the hospital's departmental manager Vicky Hall.
A week or so after this series ended, she turned up in another BBC medical soap, "Casualty," as a patient in a ward bed, but she played her part no differently, same north-eastern accent. It was as if "Vicky Hall" had had an accident and was suffering from amnesia.
She'd been on The Magic "cast" Roundabout. "Magically," appearing as someone else almost immediately after she'd disappeared from another drama.
It happens in films, but not so frequently, an example would be Elisha Cook Jr. who played a petty small time crook in dozens of films.
A week or so after this series ended, she turned up in another BBC medical soap, "Casualty," as a patient in a ward bed, but she played her part no differently, same north-eastern accent. It was as if "Vicky Hall" had had an accident and was suffering from amnesia.
She'd been on The Magic "cast" Roundabout. "Magically," appearing as someone else almost immediately after she'd disappeared from another drama.
It happens in films, but not so frequently, an example would be Elisha Cook Jr. who played a petty small time crook in dozens of films.
by Doghouse Riley October 14, 2007
Get the The Magic "cast" Roundabout.mug. Passive viewing, watching TV programme or parts thereof, not of your choice to which you've been "exposed."
It is passive viewing if you are watching a television programme you don't particularly want to see, either because you've caught a part of it while changing channels, or by selecting the wrong channel.
Suffering a programme because you are in the company of someone who wants to watch it is passive viewing.
Suffering a programme because you are in the company of someone who wants to watch it is passive viewing.
by Doghouse Riley October 14, 2007
Get the passive viewingmug.