That moment when you plan a trip to Costa Rica, but fail to ask someone to cover your work responsibilities so you can’t go. Your failure is exemplified by the fact that you got down and dirty to get your colleagues to cover for you and you still failed. Despite appealing to everyone’s good nature, offering favors and even hot sex if they would cover, everyone turned you down. Now the entire office refers to every office faux pas as a “Cost Rica Moment” just to spite you.
RR: How’s it going today guys?
DB: Just took my first deuce in three day’s and flooded out the bathroom. I didn’t fess to it, but everyone knew it was me. I guess it’s just another “Costa Rica Moment”
JK: We’ve all been there.
DB: Just took my first deuce in three day’s and flooded out the bathroom. I didn’t fess to it, but everyone knew it was me. I guess it’s just another “Costa Rica Moment”
JK: We’ve all been there.
by Darren Besert March 18, 2019
Get the Costa Rica Moment mug.The neck pain and stiffness resulting from craning ones neck backwards in order to play Starfox 64 on those elevated TV’s at Wal-Mart in 1997.
The year is 1997, I’m 10 years old and obsessed with Starfox 64. I have an N64, but money is tight and my birthday is months away leaving me no choice but to continue to accompany mom to Wal-Mart so I can play the demo game in the electronics department. She would tell me to meet her at the checkout in 20 minutes, but once I hit the start button, time turned into some arbitrary construct worthy only of being ignored. I was frequently shaken out of my Starfox stupor 3/4th of the way through the story-line to an angry mom and a nasty case of Starfox Neck. Come June, I received my own copy of Starfox 64 and the condition was never experienced again.
I still play StarFox 64 on occasion and it remains one of my favorite games. I have medal’d every level, but accomplished little else worthy of note in my life.
I still play StarFox 64 on occasion and it remains one of my favorite games. I have medal’d every level, but accomplished little else worthy of note in my life.
by Darren Besert March 19, 2019
Get the Starfox Neck mug.Acronym for “Down To Churro”. Ready and willing to consume a deep-fried pastry whether it be firm, thin and short (Cinnamon Version) or soggy, long and thick (Oreo Version) from Taco Johns. A person is DTC when they succumb to the pressure of eating at Taco John’s even if it’s only for the Churro. Being DTC doesn’t necessarily dictate that one must eat any other food there. One must be careful when DTC as the act of de-gloving and consuming such a sweet, phallic-like, food will often subject the person to compromising photography. Said opportunities are often seized by colleagues, chuckle-heads, and trolls named “Darren” to create Photoshop gold and write songs titles applicable to the situation.
Shawn: “Has anyone listened to the new album by Churreo Speedwagon?”
Darren: “Nope. How is it?”
Shawn: “Full of smash hits such as:”
“Pour Some Churro’s On Me”
“Live and Let Churro”
“American Churro”
“You Churro’d Me All Night Long”
“Mo’ Churros, Mo’ Problems”
“Churro On, Churro On”
Darren: Sounds like a winner! What inspired the album?
Shawn: Someone must have been seriously DTC and got caught. Leads to all sorts of shenanigans.
Darren: No doubt. No doubt.
Darren: “Nope. How is it?”
Shawn: “Full of smash hits such as:”
“Pour Some Churro’s On Me”
“Live and Let Churro”
“American Churro”
“You Churro’d Me All Night Long”
“Mo’ Churros, Mo’ Problems”
“Churro On, Churro On”
Darren: Sounds like a winner! What inspired the album?
Shawn: Someone must have been seriously DTC and got caught. Leads to all sorts of shenanigans.
Darren: No doubt. No doubt.
by Darren Besert April 12, 2017
Get the DTC mug.The perfect hump day combination for provocateurs and pranksters. No Wednesday night is complete without the needless, drunken, badgering of one’s adversaries via social media.
Betsy: What are we doing tonight, honey? She’s asks….already knowing the answer
Darren: “It’s Wednesday.” Spoken with a sarcastic tone and a hint of disbelief
Betsy: “and….” Her eye’s roll
Darren: “A little Trolling and Vino”
Besty “Aren’t you getting a little old for this kind of behavior?”
Darren sip. click, click, click, click… #GrotesqueMonsterWife badgering me again. Mean meme forthcoming. #DarrenBesertMemeMachine #BestedByBesert #MonetizeTheMemes
Darren: “It’s Wednesday.” Spoken with a sarcastic tone and a hint of disbelief
Betsy: “and….” Her eye’s roll
Darren: “A little Trolling and Vino”
Besty “Aren’t you getting a little old for this kind of behavior?”
Darren sip. click, click, click, click… #GrotesqueMonsterWife badgering me again. Mean meme forthcoming. #DarrenBesertMemeMachine #BestedByBesert #MonetizeTheMemes
by Darren Besert March 20, 2017
Get the Trolling and Vino mug.A technique of temporarily “saving face” with colleagues, bosses, customers, and auditors by changing every calendar and clock in a particular workplace in an effort to cover up a missed deadline. “The Calendar Option” is the “Nuclear Option” of work place fault misdirection. “The Calendar Option” should only be used when the monumental task of changing dozens of calendars, clocks, and watches pales in comparison to actually completing ones assigned task on time. Hacking of local computer and cellular networks is usually preferred, as these sources represent the primary ways of determining dates and times. “The Calendar Option” will buy you enough time to prepare a resume, write a cover page, and apply for other jobs in the timespan prior to your superiors realizing you’ve elegantly gamed them to death. Worried about future employment? Don’t! One who can successfully employ “The Calendar Option” is often far under-employed anyway. This fact is clearly demonstrated as the time, energy, intelligence and sheer skill required to pull off the maneuver could be accomplished by no less than an American, tier 1, Special Forces operator who is also a Ninja.
Are you late? Can’t blame a colleague? Can’t blame your computer? Can’t blame the weather? Don’t even bother! Just employ “The Calendar Option” and you won’t need to blame a thing because the calendar and clocks say “you’re not late!”
late nuclear option option ninja bad employee blame
late nuclear option option ninja bad employee blame
by Darren Besert January 21, 2016
Get the The Calendar Option mug.