An audition for a role in a film/play/band that is not based on the quality of actual performance, but rather on the quality of sexual favors provided to secure said role.
Jamie's such a hottie that we allowed her to whoredition for the band, even though everyone knows she can't sing to save her soul.
by CapTim March 18, 2009
A bloated, self-important and self-absorbed chump, usually disturbingly overweight and obsessed with masturbation.
Stems from tosser and waddler.
Stems from tosser and waddler.
GuyA: See that guy over there?
GuyB: That obese guy following that hot chick around?
GuyA: yeah, the guy playing pocket pool...
GuyB: What a tosswaddler!
GuyB: That obese guy following that hot chick around?
GuyA: yeah, the guy playing pocket pool...
GuyB: What a tosswaddler!
by CapTim April 15, 2008
A short story writing technique that uses the absolute minimum amount of written words to support and convey maximum meaning.
The word stems from a portmanteau of the words "skeleton" and "text", where the 'skeleton' is the minimum amount of support a human body needs, and 'text' referencing the written format.
The word stems from a portmanteau of the words "skeleton" and "text", where the 'skeleton' is the minimum amount of support a human body needs, and 'text' referencing the written format.
Have you read those Jimmy TwoTone stories yet? It's as if entire story has been stripped-down to a skeleton made purely out of words; I believe it's called "skeletext".
by CapTim May 22, 2009
A: Someone who has an unnatural penchant for wearing Speedo style swimming trunks. Usually resulting in them looking rather dodgy.
B: Someone with a large collection of Speedo style swimming trunks.
B: Someone with a large collection of Speedo style swimming trunks.
A:
Guy1: See that guy over there?
Guy2: The one with the handlebar mustache and the supertight Speedo?
Guy1: Ya! Creeepy!
Guy2: Damn, he looks like a Speedophile!
B:
Guy1: Damn! That creep has a different color Speedo for each day of the week!
Guy2: Damn speedophile!
Guy1: See that guy over there?
Guy2: The one with the handlebar mustache and the supertight Speedo?
Guy1: Ya! Creeepy!
Guy2: Damn, he looks like a Speedophile!
B:
Guy1: Damn! That creep has a different color Speedo for each day of the week!
Guy2: Damn speedophile!
by CapTim March 07, 2008
Foreplay that is not performed out of enjoyment, but rather out of a sense of duty (or entitlement).
I just wanted to get my game on... the last thing I wanted to do was get caught up in choreplay, but damn, she was so demanding.
by CapTim January 29, 2008
The absolute opposite of a hot receptionist/secretary.
A secretary so unappealing that not only would you never dare consider risking your job for sexual relations with her, but you're completely put off the entire female gender every time you pass her desk.
A secretary so unappealing that not only would you never dare consider risking your job for sexual relations with her, but you're completely put off the entire female gender every time you pass her desk.
The fantasy Jim had been having involving Angelina Jolie, a desert island and a sack of viagra was completely nullified when he walked past his contraceptionist's desk.
by CapTim January 25, 2008
The absolute opposite of a hot receptionist/secretary.
A secretary so unappealing that not only would you never dare consider risking your job for sexual relations with her, but you're completely put off the entire female gender every time you pass her desk.
A secretary so unappealing that not only would you never dare consider risking your job for sexual relations with her, but you're completely put off the entire female gender every time you pass her desk.
The fantasy Jim had been having involving Angelina Jolie, a desert island and a sack of viagra was completely nullified when he walked past his contreceptionist's desk.
by CapTim January 25, 2008