Cap'n Bullmoose's definitions
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 30, 2005
Get the dangle dancemug. 
A navigation device of ancient origin. It requires no batteries, but demands a reasonable amount of skill to use. With a compass, you can navigate through rough country to an unseen destination. It is most useful with a topographic map.
Millie used her compass to get to the ski hut.
Yuppies, Soccer Moms, and other sissies don't know how to use a compass. They need a GPS in their car just to get to work.
Yuppies, Soccer Moms, and other sissies don't know how to use a compass. They need a GPS in their car just to get to work.
by Cap'n Bullmoose July 3, 2008
Get the Compassmug. A liberal twit who always knows the deep psychological reasons behind other peoples' beliefs and behaviors. Junior Psychologists come out of their holes to make their pronouncements in college dormatories, in letters to the editor, and in discussions. Like all liberal twits, Junior Psychologists know what is best for you and me, and never miss an opportunity to tell us so.
Fenton is a Junior Psychologist. She knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that all men who drive four-wheel-drive vehicles do so because they subconsciously worry that their penises are not large enough. They buy four-wheel-drives to display as a large penis substitute. She can't conceive of a man -- or woman -- who wants a four-wheel-drive vehicle to explore the wondrous outback of America.
Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that all men who do not vote for Quean Hillary do so because they are misogynist, sexist pigs and would feel emasculated if a woman was their leader. She can't imagine that their are 72 million women better-qualified to be President than Quean Hillary, and that most men would vote for one of them.
Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that all men who own guns do so because they subconsciously fear that their penises are not long enough. They buy guns to substitute for a short penis. She can't imagine that men -- and also women -- own guns to hunt, and to shoot targets, beer cans, greasy-haired Pachuco Boys, and wimpy-ass liberals who want to take their rights away.
Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that all men who are not limp-wristed liberal mush wimps are not because they "have issues" (as she likes to say) with having their bottoms wiped the wrong way when they were infants. She can't imagine that some people do not like paying taxes for sissy liberal social programs, socialist medicine, towing the politically correct party line, or being forced to tolerate the putrid behavior of A-Rabs, panhandlers, and mincing poofters.
Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that men who do not like poofters are subconsciously afraid of their own hidden homosexual feelings. She can't imagine that any people are real men who are attracted to women and who find mincing, prancing, doing dangle dances, playing circle jerk, corn holing, and squealing "weeee" to be insipid, disgusting, perverted, and nasty.
Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that men who do not like Greasy Haired Pachucos challenging them when they walk down the sidewalk have unresolved authority issues and harbor deep-seated racial hatred for people with dark hair and brown eyes. She can't conceive of a man who will defend his right to walk in public without being challenged by a greasy punk.
Fenton, as you can see, knows absolutely nothing. She is nothing but an arrogant, whining, snot-nosed liberal soccer mom who doesn't know Jack Shit.
Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that all men who do not vote for Quean Hillary do so because they are misogynist, sexist pigs and would feel emasculated if a woman was their leader. She can't imagine that their are 72 million women better-qualified to be President than Quean Hillary, and that most men would vote for one of them.
Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that all men who own guns do so because they subconsciously fear that their penises are not long enough. They buy guns to substitute for a short penis. She can't imagine that men -- and also women -- own guns to hunt, and to shoot targets, beer cans, greasy-haired Pachuco Boys, and wimpy-ass liberals who want to take their rights away.
Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that all men who are not limp-wristed liberal mush wimps are not because they "have issues" (as she likes to say) with having their bottoms wiped the wrong way when they were infants. She can't imagine that some people do not like paying taxes for sissy liberal social programs, socialist medicine, towing the politically correct party line, or being forced to tolerate the putrid behavior of A-Rabs, panhandlers, and mincing poofters.
Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that men who do not like poofters are subconsciously afraid of their own hidden homosexual feelings. She can't imagine that any people are real men who are attracted to women and who find mincing, prancing, doing dangle dances, playing circle jerk, corn holing, and squealing "weeee" to be insipid, disgusting, perverted, and nasty.
Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that men who do not like Greasy Haired Pachucos challenging them when they walk down the sidewalk have unresolved authority issues and harbor deep-seated racial hatred for people with dark hair and brown eyes. She can't conceive of a man who will defend his right to walk in public without being challenged by a greasy punk.
Fenton, as you can see, knows absolutely nothing. She is nothing but an arrogant, whining, snot-nosed liberal soccer mom who doesn't know Jack Shit.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 28, 2008
Get the Junior Psychologistmug. by Cap'n Bullmoose April 21, 2005
Get the queanmug. A limp-wristed liberal mush wimp who knows what is best for you and me. He knows we should have our guns taken away, so only crips will have guns. Then we will have no way to defend ourselves from crips or liberals.
He wants to tax our pants off and give the money to guys of color, Mexicans, and poofters. Also to soccer moms so they can have abortions.
He wants to tax our pants off and give the money to guys of color, Mexicans, and poofters. Also to soccer moms so they can have abortions.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 21, 2005
Get the Ted Kennedymug. A short length of hose used to syphon gasoline from someone else's gas tank. You syphon the gas into a bucket, coffee can, or any other appropriate (or inappropriate) receptacle, then put it into your own gas tank.
The operator of an Okie credit card will almost always start the syphon by sucking on it, rather than covering the end of it with his thumb, then pulling the hose out a way. After all, this is an OKIE credit card.
Before the mid-1970s, you could use a length of garden hose for a Okie credit card. But in those dark days, Those Who Know What's Best for You and Me made the gas tank entrance holes much smaller. They said they did this to keep people from using unleaded gasoline, which was dispensed from a wide nozzle. But the real reason they did this was to make it harder to use an Okie credit card.
The operator of an Okie credit card will almost always start the syphon by sucking on it, rather than covering the end of it with his thumb, then pulling the hose out a way. After all, this is an OKIE credit card.
Before the mid-1970s, you could use a length of garden hose for a Okie credit card. But in those dark days, Those Who Know What's Best for You and Me made the gas tank entrance holes much smaller. They said they did this to keep people from using unleaded gasoline, which was dispensed from a wide nozzle. But the real reason they did this was to make it harder to use an Okie credit card.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 21, 2005
Get the Okie credit cardmug.