Torridge turd tickler

An unelected pen pusher who works for district government who derives pleasure from tickling random floaters left in public toilets. They will normally perform this ritual after screwing a smaller branch of local government out of assets.

Jen: Hey Wallace
Wallace: Hey Jen, hows it going?
Jen: It's going great. I've just stripped another asset from a town council, so I'm of down the public loos to perform a Torridge turd tickler to celebrate.

Wallace: Sounds good. Hope someones left a nice curler for you

by C.H.Ungs October 17, 2019

Bude

A town where A man and his Volkswagon transporter can live together without being judged.

Barry and his VW Transporter have been happily married for the last six years living in Bude

by C.H.Ungs June 27, 2018

Banter wanker

A banter wanker is a person who joins a banter group only to moan that there is no banter. They can usually be found driving a Volkswagen Transporter, and they normally wear old cock rings in their ear lobes.

Ben: This group is shit it has no Banter.
Rachael: shut up Ben you banter wanker.

Ben: you don't know what real banter is
Rachael: Is that a cock ring in your ear ben?

by C.H.Ungs November 10, 2019

Nothing Monkey

Nothing Monkey is a user of a Facebook group that observes but very rarely comments. When they do comment it is usually sarcastic in nature. They can usually be found outside of facebook hunting cats for fun.

"Wow I see Ben commented again. Yeah ben is a right Nothing monkey". "I see several cats have gone missing, probably that Nothing monkey doing it again"

by C.H.Ungs October 13, 2019

Bin Curtains

A moderator of a facebook page who rules with an iron fist. Except on Tuesdays when he's normally pretty chill.

"Wow. Jamie was being a real bin curtains today"

"Don't worry it's Tuesday tomorrow, he'll let us shit post tomorrow"

by C.H.Ungs January 20, 2019