Bob Sometimes's definitions

jizzmould

The suggestion that something will take so long that one's sperm will curdle before the said event occurs.

"Jesus Christ, I'll have jizzmould before Heskey gets a goal for England!"

by Bob Sometimes September 4, 2004

eat me out

To lick pussy in a very deep and thorough manner.

"Listen Johnny, If you don't finish your homework, I'm not going to let you eat me out tonight."

by Bob Sometimes September 4, 2004

wank catcher

A toady, sycophant, crawly person.

"Tonight on Question Time we have big-mouthed fuckwit Janet Street-Porter, grinning geek Professor Steven Hawking and Tony Blair's wank catcher, Peter Mandleson."

by Bob Sometimes September 4, 2004

tickle my turds

An expression of encouragement from a passive gay partner (or possibly from a female buggeree) indicating that they are ready and willing to have their drains cleaned.

"Never mind those celebrities in the jungle, Ant, come back to bed and tickle my turds!"

by Bob Sometimes March 23, 2005

minipop

(a) Descriptive of a sexy girl of diminutive proportions who (1) would look extremely attractive in a "school uniform/jailbait" situation and (2) looks like they might be up for it. (similar to a laptop or a throwabout

(b) To "crack one off" while contemplating the above. Named after an early Channel 4 program designed to appeal to paedophiles in which under-12s dressed up and performed pop songs.
Please note: A Minipop should not be confused with a "Krankywank" which is something quite different and totally unacceptable.

(A) "Did you see that Lisa Rogers slutting about on the Big Breakfast? Talk about a minipop!"

(B) Watching Britney's "One More Time" video always caused Gervaise to squeeze off a minipop.

by Bob Sometimes June 6, 2005

shit shunter

A veiny train that pushes the brown express back into the tunnel.

-"Lord Archer, would you kindly turn round so I can clean your drains?"
-"Ok governor, but hurry it up you shit shunter, I have to write two novels by tea time."

by Bob Sometimes September 6, 2004