Blue Cawdrey's definitions

Not Benny

During the Falkland war the English troops nicknamed the members of the local population 'Bennys' after a character from the English soap Crossroads, famous for his wooly hat and limited intelligence.
This was considered politically uncorrect and the solders were ordered to stop and that the population were not Bennys.
Henceforth the Falkland Islanders were refered to by the solders as 'Not Bennys'

Hey, corperal ask that Not Benny the way to Goose Green.

by Blue Cawdrey November 18, 2004

wanking gland

Part of the male body around which a large entertainment industry has grown.
Magazines, DVD's, and a worldwide network of computers called the Internet are dedicated to entertaining it.

I'm just going to the shop to buy a wank mag for my wanking gland.

by Blue Cawdrey November 23, 2004

Flying without a liscense

Diplomatic way of telling a man that he has neglected to zip up his trousers.

Head waiter: 'Apologetic cough, Excuse me sir do you know that you are flying without a license,
<Thought bubble> ... and that the sight of your scabby dick is upsetting our customers.

by Blue Cawdrey November 21, 2004

goner

UK: Somebody who is going to or has died, also used in an ireverent way to defuse a situation through humor.

1) Parachutist's reserve chute fails, 'he's a goner for sure'.

2) Submarine sinks below a depth where rescue is possible.
'The whole crew are goners poor bastards'.

3) Harry did not get home till 5am, he'll be a goner when his wife gets hold of him.

by Blue Cawdrey November 23, 2004

Short arm inspection

The part of a medical inspection when the doctor asks the (male) inspectee to cough.

Get the platoon lined up in front of the medical officer for short arm inspection.

by Blue Cawdrey November 18, 2004

dead as a doornail

Goes way past brain death, if your are dead as a doornail prepare to become a 'hotel for worms'.
Dodos perhaps are the only creatures with a similar lack of animation; see dead as the dodo.

On the morticians slab both Qusay and Uday were laid out cold, both dead as a doornail, they looked so peacfull that it made me really happy to see them lying there.

by Blue Cawdrey November 23, 2004

shit itself

Technical term for frequent computer behaviour when running Microsoft Operating Systems, often accompanied by a blue screen or memory dump. Will often happen just before saving work or towards the end of a large download.
Usually remedied by liberal application of the three fingered salute.

Crap on crap! the MS box has shit itself again.

by Blue Cawdrey November 18, 2004