Alhadis's definitions
Short for "preteen softcore", an acronym commonly used on P2P networks (compare with "PTHC", similarly referring to "preteen hardcore".) Regardless of whatever some sick, twisted bastard might think, downloading and sharing Softcore child pornography is no less redeemable then Hardcore child porn. It's all the same sick, twisted shit that paedophiles give acronyms such as these to in order to avoid having their disturbed shit filtered out by the standard filename keywords (e.g., "celeb", "amateur", "80-year old paedophile’s who should've been put down at birth, etc)
Limewire user: *searches for Simpsons episodes*
Limewire: *lists several various entries displaying "REAL PTSC"!!
User: "PTSC? What the hell does that stand for? I guess it must be Simpsons-related, as it *did* show up in my search."
*downloads and looks, only to be horrified by the sick shit displayed onscreen*
User: "AAARGGH!! Pffgh, what the f-...?!" *is both disgusted, horrified and worried he could be charged for possession of Child Pornography*
Limewire: *lists several various entries displaying "REAL PTSC"!!
User: "PTSC? What the hell does that stand for? I guess it must be Simpsons-related, as it *did* show up in my search."
*downloads and looks, only to be horrified by the sick shit displayed onscreen*
User: "AAARGGH!! Pffgh, what the f-...?!" *is both disgusted, horrified and worried he could be charged for possession of Child Pornography*
by Alhadis October 24, 2005
Get the PTSC mug.The darkest, heaviest, most brutal fucking thrash band to have ever struck the face of God's green earth with pure bruality. Capable of pounding out the most coolest, creepiest and most Satanic lyrics that don't actually oversaturate their image to a point of being laughable (see Deicide). Founded by Kerry King and Jeff Hanneman back in the early 80s, their influence upon the thrash movement is undisputed, with albums like "Reign in Blood" and "Seasons in the Abyss" ranking as the most influential and famous thrash albums in record history.
As far as this author's concerned, Metallica don't fucking deserve to be considered the backbone of thrash. Metallica sold out and changed, but Slayer never did. They didn't compromise their sound for fucking anybody, and to this date, they've remained sheer volume and pumelling riffs that totally kick the shit out of all but the heaviest of Death metal.
To date, their most recent album is "Christ Illusion"; another brutal masterpiece that illustrates how well they've stuck to their roots. "Catatonia" has a guitar solo that's to die for. Quite literally if you're ears are too weak to handle the overpowering bad-ass-itude of Slayer's music (and no, that wasn't a real word, so don't bother looking it up on UD).
As far as this author's concerned, Metallica don't fucking deserve to be considered the backbone of thrash. Metallica sold out and changed, but Slayer never did. They didn't compromise their sound for fucking anybody, and to this date, they've remained sheer volume and pumelling riffs that totally kick the shit out of all but the heaviest of Death metal.
To date, their most recent album is "Christ Illusion"; another brutal masterpiece that illustrates how well they've stuck to their roots. "Catatonia" has a guitar solo that's to die for. Quite literally if you're ears are too weak to handle the overpowering bad-ass-itude of Slayer's music (and no, that wasn't a real word, so don't bother looking it up on UD).
Metalhead #1: "I went to a Slayer concert the other week."
Metalhead #2: "Shit man, you survive?"
Metalhead #1: "I lost three fingers in a mosh pit, sustained cranial brain damage from being kicked against the floor... loved every fucking minute of it."
Metalhead #2: "Hell yeah. You catch a guitar pick?"
Metalhead #1: "Yep, I'll strum with it after I get feeling back in my fingers."
Metalhead #2: "Shit man, you survive?"
Metalhead #1: "I lost three fingers in a mosh pit, sustained cranial brain damage from being kicked against the floor... loved every fucking minute of it."
Metalhead #2: "Hell yeah. You catch a guitar pick?"
Metalhead #1: "Yep, I'll strum with it after I get feeling back in my fingers."
by Alhadis September 15, 2008
Get the Slayer mug.BROM is a widely recognized and highly acclaimed veteran in the fantasy art industry, distinctly recognized for the "dark feel" he embelishes in his paintings. Work is often found published in Wizards of the Coast products, and similar Role-playing games (eg, D&D, Dead Lands, Magic: the Gathering, etc)
(Further reference: Official art site can be found at BROMART.com)
(Further reference: Official art site can be found at BROMART.com)
by Alhadis January 18, 2004
Get the BROM mug.The webmaster of eBaumsworld.com, arguebly the most shamelessly self-promoting site on the Internet. Has its fair share of funny material, all of which was scrounged around the Internet and has had the eBaumsworld logo crapped on it in some way, effectively shitting on the face of the content's real owner. Also infamous for false advertising; if eBaumsworld's promotes itself as hosting "clean humour and nothing pornographic", then I'd shudder at anything the webmaster might consider remotely "dirty".
Image banner: "This image is NOT the property of eBaumsworld's.com"
Surfer: "So why the flying fuck is this ugly banner stripped across it?! It's fucking the picture up!"
Answer: Because anybody linking to said image is actually promoting the site by anybody reading the domain name stripped across the violated picture. Brilliant strategy, eBaum.
Surfer: "So why the flying fuck is this ugly banner stripped across it?! It's fucking the picture up!"
Answer: Because anybody linking to said image is actually promoting the site by anybody reading the domain name stripped across the violated picture. Brilliant strategy, eBaum.
by Alhadis December 9, 2004
Get the eBaum mug.A ringtone company that is responsible for producing the most unbearably irritating commercials to have ever plagued television. Most hideously annoying of all is that sodding "frog" (which resembles a swollen tumour given eyes, a helmet, and tiny genetalia with a "Censored" tag crapped across it), whose high-pitched squealing, ridiculously annoying animations and general nature, all proves that Jamster is making their profits from a DELIBERATE attempt to drive people insane. So far, for many audiences, it's working.
Aside from that sodding amphibian that's become Jamster's most infamously irritating mascot, Jamster provide equally annoying ringtones, wallpapers and screensavers, many of which are crass, crappy, and/or lame, 4-5 frame animations. Anybody willing to waste money for something that was directly manifested out of pure hate, evil and a company's desire to further shove one more annoying commercial into the TV network's already over-bloated advertising market... need to be cleansed from the human gene pool.
Aside from that sodding amphibian that's become Jamster's most infamously irritating mascot, Jamster provide equally annoying ringtones, wallpapers and screensavers, many of which are crass, crappy, and/or lame, 4-5 frame animations. Anybody willing to waste money for something that was directly manifested out of pure hate, evil and a company's desire to further shove one more annoying commercial into the TV network's already over-bloated advertising market... need to be cleansed from the human gene pool.
Watcher #1: "Oh shits, not that fucking Jamster commercial! SHIT, where's the fucking remote?!"
Crazy Frog: *mimics a DJ whilst squeaking in pitched tones*
Watcher #1: "Ah, shit! I can't find it! Quick, do SOMETHING!"
Watcher #2: "AAAARRGGGGH!!" *hurls a baseball bat into the TV-screen*
Watcher #1: "That's the third fucking television Jamster's caused me to break. Fuck, I need to start keeping track of where the remote's kept."
Crazy Frog: *mimics a DJ whilst squeaking in pitched tones*
Watcher #1: "Ah, shit! I can't find it! Quick, do SOMETHING!"
Watcher #2: "AAAARRGGGGH!!" *hurls a baseball bat into the TV-screen*
Watcher #1: "That's the third fucking television Jamster's caused me to break. Fuck, I need to start keeping track of where the remote's kept."
by Alhadis May 27, 2005
Get the Jamster mug.Despite being one of the funniest writers alive, and having a nearly unsurpassed level of creative genius, this man is *still* largely underrated as one of England's most brilliant writers, with writers like J.K. Rowling walking away with the most fame and recognition for books that are, in comparison to the Discworld novels, overrated piles of crap. There's nothing in Terry Pratchett's works that could make me keep a straight face- EVER, and each novel is utterly hilarious in a well-worded, balanced fashion that conveys a distinctive style of British humour that's become Terry Pratchett's style. The man might be coming along in his years, but he's shown NO signs of slowing down over the years... hilarious, creative, witty, and able to write novels that're both clever and compelling without overdoing humour or storyline. That's the true essence of Pratchett's genius; not just being funny, but keeping readers involved in the book rather then the jokes alone.
Pick up one of his novels and give yourself a laugh. If you find yourself reading through at least a single chapter and can't laugh at least ONCE, you're in need of some serious psychological assistance.
Pick up one of his novels and give yourself a laugh. If you find yourself reading through at least a single chapter and can't laugh at least ONCE, you're in need of some serious psychological assistance.
"Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day. Set fire to the man and he's warm for the rest of his life." ~ Jingo, another of Terry Pratchett's more well-known novels.
by Alhadis July 31, 2008
Get the Terry Pratchett mug.Comes from the Old English verb for "shudder" (presumably the origin of the modern word "gruesome" as well; literally "shudder-some"). Grues are creepy, sinister creatures from the Zork series, the oldest and most influential of the old text-based adventure games. They're hardly ever seen because they despise light and only emerge in areas of complete darkness, where they prey upon adventurers and enchanters. Easily pissed off and vicious, they're repelled by even the faintest glow of light; meaning that a simple torch can be enough to keep the grues at bay. They're mysterious; short of their glaring eyes and sharp fangs-and-teeth, nobody knows what grues look like, exactly. They're known for their constant slaving and gurgling, and especially their nasty tempers.
In the game's feedback display itself, the grues were often a warning that a user should start looking for a light source... badly. "You have entered a dark area. You will likely be eaten by a grue" was a common description in the Zork adventure games; adventurers going underground would be wise to bring a good supply of oil for a lantern. Once the lights go out, the grues swarm all over you (ripping you apart before the game gives you a death message, like "Grues eat well tonight"). Infocom's official description of the "grue" (notice the lack of plural; it was unclear in the earlier Zork instalments whether there was only *one* grue, lurking as a sinister presence in the underground's darkness... or more then one) is:
"The grue, according to scholars of the Great Underground Empire, is a sinister, lurking presence in the dark places of the earth. Its favourite diet is either adventurers or enchanters, but its insatiable appetite is tempered by its extreme fear of light. No grues have ever been seen by the light of day, and only a few have been observed in their underground lairs. Of those who have seen grues, few have survived their fearsome jaws to tell the tale. Grues have sharp claws and fangs, and an uncontrollable tendency to slaver and gurgle. They are certainly the most evil-tempered of all creatures; to say they are touchy is a dangerous understatement. "Sour as a grue" is a common expression, even among themselves."
In the game's feedback display itself, the grues were often a warning that a user should start looking for a light source... badly. "You have entered a dark area. You will likely be eaten by a grue" was a common description in the Zork adventure games; adventurers going underground would be wise to bring a good supply of oil for a lantern. Once the lights go out, the grues swarm all over you (ripping you apart before the game gives you a death message, like "Grues eat well tonight"). Infocom's official description of the "grue" (notice the lack of plural; it was unclear in the earlier Zork instalments whether there was only *one* grue, lurking as a sinister presence in the underground's darkness... or more then one) is:
"The grue, according to scholars of the Great Underground Empire, is a sinister, lurking presence in the dark places of the earth. Its favourite diet is either adventurers or enchanters, but its insatiable appetite is tempered by its extreme fear of light. No grues have ever been seen by the light of day, and only a few have been observed in their underground lairs. Of those who have seen grues, few have survived their fearsome jaws to tell the tale. Grues have sharp claws and fangs, and an uncontrollable tendency to slaver and gurgle. They are certainly the most evil-tempered of all creatures; to say they are touchy is a dangerous understatement. "Sour as a grue" is a common expression, even among themselves."
Text-screen: "You have entered the crypt. A hallway slopes downwards before you, leading into pitch blackness."
User #1 (types in): "head downwards"
Screen: "You walk into the darkness. You will likely surely be eaten by a grue if you don't find a light source."
User #2 (talking to first user): "Dude, you're gonna get eaten by grues..."
User #1: "Don't worry, I brought a lantern." *types in* "take out lantern*
Screen: "You left the crypt door open. A draft blows through, putting out your lantern."
User #1: "Oh shits, I knew I should've brought a hooded lantern."
User #2: "Quick, light it again!"
User #1: "Can't, man. No oil or matches."
Screen: "Another wind picks up and closes the crypt's door, blocking out the moonlight."
User #1: "Oh man, no matches or anything...? We are *so* fucked..."
Screen: "It's nice and dark in here. Just the way the grues like it..." *screen goes black, followed by nasty growling sounds*
User #1: "Son-of-a-bitch... remind me to stick a rock in the door to keep it from blowing shut next time."
User #1 (types in): "head downwards"
Screen: "You walk into the darkness. You will likely surely be eaten by a grue if you don't find a light source."
User #2 (talking to first user): "Dude, you're gonna get eaten by grues..."
User #1: "Don't worry, I brought a lantern." *types in* "take out lantern*
Screen: "You left the crypt door open. A draft blows through, putting out your lantern."
User #1: "Oh shits, I knew I should've brought a hooded lantern."
User #2: "Quick, light it again!"
User #1: "Can't, man. No oil or matches."
Screen: "Another wind picks up and closes the crypt's door, blocking out the moonlight."
User #1: "Oh man, no matches or anything...? We are *so* fucked..."
Screen: "It's nice and dark in here. Just the way the grues like it..." *screen goes black, followed by nasty growling sounds*
User #1: "Son-of-a-bitch... remind me to stick a rock in the door to keep it from blowing shut next time."
by Alhadis May 9, 2005
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