Alex Quantashassle's definitions

arse load

Noun. In large quantities, a lot of, a great amount. British.

"She's given me arse loads of paperwork to complete before lunch."

by Alex Quantashassle April 11, 2005

arse over kettle

Phrs. Fall over. Also 'arse over tea kettle'.

"I was just strolling along the lino when, alluvasudden, I tripped over one of the ankle-biters' toys and fell arse over kettle!"

by Alex Quantashassle April 11, 2005

double-alaskan-semi-cockadoodle-doo-rainstorm

The extreme & bizarre sexual act, where your girlfriend takes a good mouthful, and implodes, spraying semen-like dandruff everywhere. She then pulls on her nipples, and ties a noose and your neck with them, virtually hanging you. She them pulls her legs around your neck, reviving you. She then wrenches her thighs back, exploding pubic hair up your nostril. She then leans back and ends the whole thing off by making a limmerick about Amanda Vanstone and a giant lemon. If you haven't reached some form of orgasm by now, you're impotent.

"Jesus-pleesus!"
"Yeah, that's what they all say."

by Alex Quantashassle June 1, 2005

literary

Another word for a high school english teacher, or a university humanties professor. Used commonly amongst politcians, in order to segment them as a minority group.

John Howard: "I'm rather - acquainted with the - literaries at the - University of - Canberra."

Kim Beazely: "I sincerely doubt that, prime minister, as there is no longer a University of Canberra since you proposed the bill in question last month!"

John Howard: "......."

Kim Beazely: "I'm sorry prime minister? What was that?"

John Howard: "......this man is - trying to corrupt me!"

Kim Beazely: "Oh, god!"

by Alex Quantashassle June 7, 2005

refunded

A way to describe a prostitute who just wasn't quite up to scratch.

"Yea hombre, look at her!"
"Forget it emano, she's refunded."

by Alex Quantashassle June 5, 2005

per

How people say the name of my hometown when they can't pronounce the 'th' sound. It has become a bit of a cultural statement round these parts.

"I think I'll go vacation in Per'."
"Go see a speech therapist dude."

by Alex Quantashassle June 5, 2005

allocation

Noun. Term used amongst organised drug dealers. It means the territory which they have been given to spread the drugs around. Very commonly used in suburban England and Australia.

"12 ks of coke, my friend."
"Oh yeah? I suppose your allocation's Armadale then."
"Spot on!"

by Alex Quantashassle April 21, 2005