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safe sex 

Moving the bed two feet from the wall so your girl doesn't get a concussion.
EMS: "Sir how did this happen?"
Me: "We were fuckin' and then i had a back spasm and she hit her head from the thrust."
EMS: "Sir, practice safe sex next time and move the bed away from the wall."
safe sex by AngryWhiteMale May 11, 2003

SafeSearch 

The only thing between you and using Google to find all kinds of porn.
Turn of SafeSearch and ypu can find all the porn you want on Google.
SafeSearch by anonymous March 9, 2005

Safe Sex 

Safe sex is in the palm of your hand.
Masturbate you idiot if your that concerned about STD's or pregnancy. Its the safest safe sex you'll ever have
Safe Sex by Oddjobguy147 May 1, 2006

Safe Sex 

Safe Sex by Jason March 1, 2004

safe sex 

Using a condom or pill during sex so a baby is not conceived, an STD is not transmitted. However, it is kind of an oxymoron:
Donald discovered that safe sex is not really safe after his girlfriend, Katherine, choked on his condom and died.
safe sex by Erika July 24, 2004

SAFE SEX TIPS 

Do not blow dealers for crack; blow regular citizens for cash, then buy the crack directly.

Think about parents' nude bodies during foreplay; resultant loss of erection will prevent potential unsafe sex.

Don't fall for lines like, "God protects his servants in the clergy from harm."

Do not, no matter how much peers may pressure you, allow anyone to get to third base with you.

Before unsafe sex, think to yourself what the kids will look like.

Make sure all open sores on penis have thoroughly dried and scabbed over before use.

When taking four cocks in the ass, make sure to have an equal amount of cock in your mouth to reduce the risk of CHI imbalance.

Before fellating anonymous man in back room of bar, be sure to ask, "You don't have AIDS, do you?"

Douse penis liberally with D-Con roach spray before penetrating ape.

You CAN get it from kissing... tear out partner's tongue before any mouth-to-mouth contact.

To prevent radiation exposure, use only lead-based condoms.

If you must engage in unsafe sex, take time out before hand to hope for the best.

Before the use of condoms, unroll completely and check for any holes.
person1: have a look at these SAFE SEX TIPS there mint
person2: (reads it)
person2: cool lol