Car On Wheels
Car On Wheels by Scrange Lord July 23, 2016
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Vagina cartwheels
An elaborate sexual maneuver involving weeks of preparation and a large initial cost investment (should be avoided by all but the most committed and enthusiastic individuals). Supplies needed: octopus, gym membership, a fun-loving and adventure-seeking spirit, more lube than you've ever used in your life, an on-site surgeon (in case of disaster) and Grimm's Book of Fairy Tales.
Instructions:
1) become extremely fit as a member of your local gym or community center.
2) purchase a salt water tank and octopus-- preferably a Caribbean reef octopus for its lovely indigo hue, but the common Octopus vulgaris will do.
3) *ANIMAL CRUELTY INVOLVED IN THE FOLLOWING STEP* De-tentacle the octopus, and desert the body in the appropriate biohazard container of your choice. Preserve the tentacles in your salt water tank.
4) Read your partner, in the accent of your choice, the most fucked-up of Grimm's Fairy Tales. Excellent choices include Little Red Riding Hood and Hansel & Gretel.
4) For every murmur of horror they admit, slap your partner's genitalia with the tentacles.
5) Repeat until the fairy tales are complete or the tentacles no longer have any live neurons and cannot move on their own.
6) Afterwards, do cartwheels to air out one's vagina! THE VAGINA CARTWHEEL IS NOT COMPLETE WITHOUT THIS PROCESS.
THIS SEXUAL MANEUVER IS ILLEGAL IN THE CONTINENTAL UNITED STATES AND PUERTO RICO.
SATISFACTION GUARANTEED*
(post-traumatic stress disorder a distinct possibility)
Instructions:
1) become extremely fit as a member of your local gym or community center.
2) purchase a salt water tank and octopus-- preferably a Caribbean reef octopus for its lovely indigo hue, but the common Octopus vulgaris will do.
3) *ANIMAL CRUELTY INVOLVED IN THE FOLLOWING STEP* De-tentacle the octopus, and desert the body in the appropriate biohazard container of your choice. Preserve the tentacles in your salt water tank.
4) Read your partner, in the accent of your choice, the most fucked-up of Grimm's Fairy Tales. Excellent choices include Little Red Riding Hood and Hansel & Gretel.
4) For every murmur of horror they admit, slap your partner's genitalia with the tentacles.
5) Repeat until the fairy tales are complete or the tentacles no longer have any live neurons and cannot move on their own.
6) Afterwards, do cartwheels to air out one's vagina! THE VAGINA CARTWHEEL IS NOT COMPLETE WITHOUT THIS PROCESS.
THIS SEXUAL MANEUVER IS ILLEGAL IN THE CONTINENTAL UNITED STATES AND PUERTO RICO.
SATISFACTION GUARANTEED*
(post-traumatic stress disorder a distinct possibility)
"My, what large teeth you have!" *gasp of horror* *slapping noise*
"Hey, I hear Henry F. is super-into Vagina Cartwheels!"
"Hey, I hear Henry F. is super-into Vagina Cartwheels!"
Vagina cartwheels by the love pad November 12, 2012
Related Words
Car On Wheels • 69 cartwheels • Toothed-Cartwheels • Vagina cartwheels • car • car pool • Car Guy • car boner • car crash • car jacking
Toothed-Cartwheels
You put/tie your hands behind your back, lean forward and extend your front teeth in an attempt to prepare to do a cartwheel. Using your TEETH as leverage only (not your hands at all), you do the cartwheel, having your teeth hit the ground instead of your hands. This can be done in times of utter excitement or even disappointment. It is to suggest that you are overly emotional about something.
Toothed-Cartwheels by Bobby Cipolla June 4, 2007
69 cartwheels
69 cartwheels by side hoe79 June 22, 2016
Nerd neck
A "human" that spends so much time playing video games that their posture is level nerd neck. Everytime anyone goes tryhard they hunch down and their neck gets longer there fore a nerd neck is always hunched down cause they're always going try hard. In other words a nerd neck is a try hard, since their neck is 100% longer than the average human being due to playing too many video games and taking them serious, nerd necks are not even considered human anymore but something more sad. Nerd necks are often found on fortnite, their natural habitat usually being tilted towers.
Nerd neck by D Sandwich Maker February 5, 2019
Word of the Day on June 25, 2026
prickup
slip of the tongue perhaps,
Those idiots who drive around in a ridiculously raised pick up truck, making a top heavy vehicle even more top heavy and unstable
Those idiots who drive around in a ridiculously raised pick up truck, making a top heavy vehicle even more top heavy and unstable