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n. The process of masturbating under any time pressure. Also a sport when played competitively.
I had a meeting in 5 minutes, but I just really needed to rub one off. I was speedsturbating my ass off!

Alright, everyone, you know the rules to Speedsturbation. Money in the pot in the center of the hallway. I say go, first person to enter their dorm room and successfully finish, clean up, and come back out gets it all... GO!
by Squiggle312 November 18, 2009
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Cleveland Steamer Plush

The vengeful act of crapping on a lover's chest while they sleep.

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