Ramen, as we know it, is an anemically Americanized version of a Japanese rip-off a Chinese gastronomical phenomenon known as lo mein. That means that, not only are the noodles pressed into a cake and dried, but both the noodles and the sauce are also purified of all useful nutrients. It amounts to strings of bleached flour steeped in warm brine.
OK, so we're convenience addicts, but we still don't have to settle for such flavorless, salty broth and mushy noodles.

Go to an oriental food store. Don't worry that that we look like guyjiin when we walk in. It can't be helped, so don't worry about it. Buy a few packages of Mi Bo.

Mi is a southeast Asian word, equivalent to the Chinese word mein, meaning "noodle". Bo is a southeast Asian word for moo, or cow, as if in English we said "moo" instead of borrowing the word "cow" from some other language to replace our word moo. Southeast Asians go ahead and say their word for cow when they talk about what they eat, instead of borrowing the word "beef" from yet another language to replace our word cow. How sensible of them.

So you go into the oriental food store and buys some packages of cow-flavored noodles. The packages look just like ramen noodle packages, so make sure you don't buy any Americanized brands like Smack or Top. Mama and Kung Fu are good brands.

If you don't recognize any brands, check by feel, what the flavor packet is like. Good flavor packets in truly oriental "ramen" packages will feel thicker and softer because they contain two or three different kinds of seasonings: A regular flavor packet, a flavored oil packet and possibly, a spice packet.

Dump the flavoring packets into half as much water as you're used to using for ramen while it's heating so you have a nice broth that will cook flavor into the noodles when you add them. Do some taste-testing while gradually adding the spice, so you don't find the final result toxic to your taste buds. Don't add the noodles until the water boils. Keep it boiling until the noodles are done.

If you want to be authentic, don't break the noodles. Some parts of Asia use chopsticks and some don't, so that's optional.

If you prefer convenience, break the noodles small enough to fit in your soup spoon.

Lift the noodles out of the broth and place them into a bowl and garnish it generously with bean sprouts, snow peas, and/or chopped onion to suit your taste. Then pour the boiling broth over it all.

When you're ready for another adventure, go back and buy some other flavor.
by Downstrike November 22, 2004
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food of the gods. consists of squiggly noodle brick and a packet of condensed flavor powder.
Moses: whatcha eating?
God: Ramen.
by mephisto June 03, 2003
The only thing between 500,000 Americans and utter starvation.
"Ramen is the shit. Obviously."
by Rie November 11, 2003
Can be acquired in two convenient, and scrumptious, forms.

1) Cup O' Ramen.
2) Brick O' Ramen.

College students base their diets around beef, shrimp, chicken, and oriental flavored noodles.

There are better, tastier foods to purchase, such as hot pockets and bagel bites. But ramen saves money so you can buy more liquor, so who really gives a fuck.
Jess, a college student, has ramen for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. She's lucky that ramen exists, because if it didn't, she'd be crying from starvation and drinking no more tears shampoo.
by G|23G October 23, 2003
The cheapest and most delicious meal on the planet.
Ramen is only 10 cents a package ^.^
by Tom January 04, 2005
what college kids and janitors live off of.....dried slab of noodles that you cook for 3 minutes and then add sodium-enriched seasoning of all flavors to. requires knowledge of stove.
by etchasketch October 21, 2003
1.) Delicious, inexpensive noodle soup good for either a light snack or a meal. Goes great with those pre-cooked strips of chicken or beef you can buy at the supermarket. Tastes like shit if overcooked, though.

2.) Inexpensive noodle soup eaten by the Wapanese only because it comes from Japan. They don't actually like ramen at all. They just like the fact that they don't have to import the shit. Not to be confused with normal people who eat ramen because they actually like the taste and/or are too poor to afford anything else.
1.) "This stuff may be cheap, but it's actually good. Beef and Pork ramen are my favorites flavors."

2.) "Kawaii desu!! Pork ramen!! Oh thank Kami-sama, since I don't have to import this from Japan, I can order another box of Cucumber and Teriyaki-flavor pocky! Uh-oh, Sailor Moon is about to start! Ikuhayo~~!! ^_^ LoLooLllLOlOloLo!o11!11!!"
by Ninja Disaster August 25, 2003
Cheap instant noodles. Comes in a hard brick of noodles which you throw into a pot on the stove with water in it for 3 minutes. Once the noodles are done, you have lots of options. If you like ramen, try this: strain the noodles, put them in a bowl and add 3/4 of the seasoning packet. Whoo hoo! Also comes in cup o' soup which is for the microwave. Available in many flavors and brands but the best by far is Maruchan Shrimp. DONT EAT TOP RAMEN SHRIMP IT TASTES LIKE SALT WATER!!
Welcome to RAA, Ramen Addicts Anonymous.
by Evil Bella January 07, 2004
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