Clerk: I'm sorry sir, we don't have ramen.
Otaku: Verry well. Mussst have brainssss!!
Clerk: Sir, If I had brains, I wouldn't be working in a conveniencee store...what the f**k? Get off me! ARRGH! My Brains!"
Pastor and congregation: RAmen
2) Technically incorrect name for instant noodles, as they can be other types, like bah kut teh (Malay) or tom yam gung (Thai). Can be made in just a few minutes, but has some drawbacks:
-Not as healthy as real noodles, as the noodle brick was flash-fried beforehand.
-Typically loaded with MSG. When consumed in large amounts, it can make your hair gray or even fall out.
3) Something to do with "amen" and Pastafarianism, I'm not sure what exactly.
*two years later*
Silly person- Wowee! A natural hair dyer! I should tell my friends about this!
Go to an oriental food store. Don't worry that that we look like guyjiin when we walk in. It can't be helped, so don't worry about it. Buy a few packages of Mi Bo.
Mi is a southeast Asian word, equivalent to the Chinese word mein, meaning "noodle". Bo is a southeast Asian word for moo, or cow, as if in English we said "moo" instead of borrowing the word "cow" from some other language to replace our word moo. Southeast Asians go ahead and say their word for cow when they talk about what they eat, instead of borrowing the word "beef" from yet another language to replace our word cow. How sensible of them.
So you go into the oriental food store and buys some packages of cow-flavored noodles. The packages look just like ramen noodle packages, so make sure you don't buy any Americanized brands like Smack or Top. Mama and Kung Fu are good brands.
If you don't recognize any brands, check by feel, what the flavor packet is like. Good flavor packets in truly oriental "ramen" packages will feel thicker and softer because they contain two or three different kinds of seasonings: A regular flavor packet, a flavored oil packet and possibly, a spice packet.
Dump the flavoring packets into half as much water as you're used to using for ramen while it's heating so you have a nice broth that will cook flavor into the noodles when you add them. Do some taste-testing while gradually adding the spice, so you don't find the final result toxic to your taste buds. Don't add the noodles until the water boils. Keep it boiling until the noodles are done.
If you want to be authentic, don't break the noodles. Some parts of Asia use chopsticks and some don't, so that's optional.
If you prefer convenience, break the noodles small enough to fit in your soup spoon.
Lift the noodles out of the broth and place them into a bowl and garnish it generously with bean sprouts, snow peas, and/or chopped onion to suit your taste. Then pour the boiling broth over it all.
When you're ready for another adventure, go back and buy some other flavor.