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A certified and trained prostitute of the mind, who naturally charges for his/her services by the hour.
Dr. Sigmund Freud
by nethcev! April 28, 2004

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A person licensed by the state with a doctoral degree. Psychologists assess and treat people's mental health.
Dr. Weschler was a great psychologist.
by Dr. Jonesy March 07, 2009

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1. Friend-for-pay.
2. A pathological liar.
3. A better and happier person than the patient.
I was driving when I saw a psychologist.
by Count Dooko August 20, 2005

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Ordinary people who went to college for about 10 years after high school just to be able to listen to lunatics bitch all day long. They also have a shitload of student loans. A good movie that illustrates a Doctor's struggles in this profession is called "What about Bob?".
Some of my favorite Psychologists are:

1. Wilhelm Wundt
2. BF Skinner
3. John B Watson
by psychology nerd July 16, 2011

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someone who thinks that problems thought up by the mind can be solved by even more thinking
Psychologist - "next time you are depressed i want to you stop being depressed by thinking about not being depressed"

patient- "ok"
by byyeeeeaaahhhhwat April 08, 2015

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Some dumb cunt you go to see when you're head is fucked up to try and get help.
Psychologist: You must tell me what's wrong with you. And only you can help yourself.

Me: Seriously!? You had to go to med school and get a $50k a year salary just for saying that shit? I could do that!
by Goth Doll June 30, 2016

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Useless.
Aha! There goes another useless psychologist!
by victorhadin March 27, 2003

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