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"OLD" IS WHEN..... Your sweetheart says, "Let's go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Darling, I can't do both!"

"OLD" IS WHEN..... Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... A sexy girl takes your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... Going topless pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along with her.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... you are told to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in the car park.

"OLD" IS WHEN..... An "all nighter" means not getting up to pee!
Old by alvit July 7, 2009
1) Aged. Can be referring to something alive or nonliving.

2) Outdated.

3) No longer funny.
1) My fifth-grade elementary teacher was old when I was in her class, and presumably hasn't gotten any younger since I left.

2) The Nintendo 64 is old, but I still use it more than my GameCube.

3) Jokes about Jim Mora (Sr.) whining about his miserable Colts team aren't old yet, despite the fact that he conducted the infamous press conference more than three years ago.
Old by Diggity Monkeez March 5, 2005
Old is when its more expensive to buy the candles, than the cake to put it on.
candles cost $.25 a piece, and you are 60 years old making the total cost of candles $15. the cake costs $4.
old by Wayne Static May 14, 2005
that which is not new
old by Anonymous November 7, 2003
You begin to be old when people who deliver pizzas are systematically younger than you.

(See young)
Anyway im even too old to command pizzas by now.
old by Flaz July 16, 2008
Something that was said and/or done repeatedly that has been totally played out. Tired. Annoying.
The past he kept bringing up to my face is gotten real old right about now!
old by T. Brown October 18, 2007