friend of bob's definitions

field of douche

Describing any party heavily populated with douchebags to the point where one will literally be covered in douche upon entering. Such occurrences have begun to happen with increasing frequency, as teenagers become more violently attracted to rap, arrogance, and a penchant for acting knowledgeable, despite evidence on the contrary. College students, particularly, are quite susceptible to this behavior. Hence, nearly any college party can be likened to a field of douche. Avoid high school parties unless your whole body is as dirty as a rotten vagina.

I entered a field of douche with a raincoat and hid under it most of the time in fear, constantly citing one of Marlon Brando's famous lines in the film, Apocalypse Now: "The horror..the horror!"

by friend of bob June 19, 2004

Joan of Arc

French woman existing during the late Medieval era with purported abilities to articulate holy messages and warfare manuevers via liaison with a spiritual entity heavily favoring France at this particular time. Contemporary theories maintain Joan as shizoprenic.

I wonder if Joan of Arc was hot.

by friend of bob July 17, 2004

loneliness

You know it becomes really bad when you start posting definitions of it on a website in hopes of someone reading it. I can only recommend two things. Find some new friends. Or find none at all, and eventually you'll get used to it. I've tried both, and I can't really say which one is better than the other.

Music recommendations: Aimee Mann, Alice in Chains, Dishwalla, Pink Floyd (Pulse). Get a job. Smoke weed. Drink. Smoke cigarettes. If you're depending on something else other than a lost love or friends, you won't need them as much. But there always be a little but of pain...

by friend of bob June 13, 2004

rifle report

The sound of dumping on some fools.

We blasted those niggas until the rifle report was heard by my beyatch.

by friend of bob June 13, 2004

MTV

In response to the induhvidual (yes, that word was deliberately misspelled, for those who are unaware of Scott Adams), I must say, the only moron speaking your selected quote is you. And "victims" of the trends MTV produces? Hardly the case. It disturbs me that people as stupid as you exist.

The guy who calls himself "mtv is cooler than you" is an obvious example of someone who has replaced his brains with douche. His very existence is a sad watermark on the history of mankind. Let us hope he does not provide a description of a brick wall, for that would be a Mt. Everest of accomplishment for this poor, stupid soul.

by friend of bob July 26, 2004

The worst thing you can call someone

If target is male: baby dick
If target is female: (there are far too many insults that can send any member of the female gender into wild fenzy of violent rage)

You: Hey there, friend of bob, I mean "baby dick".
Me: YOU BASTARD!!!!! (walks away in shame)

Me: Hey there, (random female).
Female: (ignores and walks way, usually finding someone more attractive)

by friend of bob June 11, 2006

douchebag

A description that fits nearly every teenager who conforms monotonously to popular culture. Often known for their tendency to have low individuality and severe intolerance for those that exhibit different behavior. Note: The best location to study the ridiculous patterns of douchebags is your local mall.

That dude is such a douchebag....

by friend of bob May 15, 2004