The Gotch's Razor 

The philosophical RAZOR that maintains you should never attribute to inebriation which may be adequately explained by monumental imbecility.

Dick Less's latest idiotic post is a textbook example of The Gotch's Razor

The Gotch's Razor by Cornelius Gotchberg December 17, 2018

Scooter the Gooch 

(Verb)
1. When the clitoris is stimulated by rubbing against a partner’s gooch. 2. Hetero-tribbing. 3. To lose by a narrow margin in the last second.

alt. Gucci Scooter

(1)“Hey Janet are you going to make it to the OFFL Fantasy draft tonight?”
“Nah, I’ll probably stay in, open a bottle of wine, and Scooter the Gooch with hubby”
(2) “Man, I really Scootered the Gooch last game.”

Scooter the Gooch by Buckle My Shoe 3 4 November 26, 2020

screw the gooch 

To screw up really badly. To miss the point of something and do something else. Comes from the idea that when having sex, one misses the pussy and starts humping a woman's gooch, the area between her pussy and ass, making a fool out of himself and screwing up. Don Eimus is a person screwed the gooch when he disrespected some thugish black-woman basketball players.

"I knew I should't have nailed Monica Lewinski... Damn i screwed the gooch."

I did my report completely wrong. Man i really screwed the gooch."

"Matt, youre' a jew so don't have sex with that terrorist's daughter. You'd have to be a total dumbass to screw the gooch like that"

screw the gooch by Ushtenhouser January 11, 2008

Swivel the gooch 

When you receive a handjob that intricately goes from head to balls but also caresses the gooch in a swivel like motion.

Man, my ex used to give the best handjobs no homo she swiveled the gooch?

Bruh, this new girl I started fucking with wants to take it slow but I don't got time to play. I need to bust one off ASAP. "Maybe you should teach her how to swivel the gooch? "

Swivel the gooch by Alacardt May 23, 2018

Smokin the Gouch 

To vigorously suckle and/or chomp upon the taint/perineum area of another person or thing.

The priest dropped his pants and made me smoke his gouch because I farted duing the sermon; I had just learned how smokin the gouch process was.

Smokin the Gouch by Danny Grasso October 16, 2008