If I'd known you were coming, I'd have shaved my beard

Da "parody on da cake-baking saying" remark dat you smilingly say to a cute chick whom you've unexpectedly met somewhere, and you are savoringly pressing her soft warm palms against yer fuzzy cheeks.

I always love joking around about, "If I'd known you were coming, I'd have shaved my beard" wif pretty girls whom I befriend; said humorous remark always gets da biggest amused giggle-fits outta dem.

If I'd known you were coming, I'd have shaved my beard by QuacksO October 22, 2023

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if i had wheels i'd be a wagon

You change reality;it is what it is

Person 1: I wish I had different parents

Person 2: Well,if I had wheels I'd be a wagon

if i had wheels i'd be a wagon by BeastGirl Forever May 26, 2014

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If i had an eye on my dick, i'd see inside your mouth

An insultive phrase, denoting that you fuck somebody's mouth, that's not ever meant to be true, but it's always funny to tell it to your friends/enemies/dog/slaves/mailmen/mailwomen/pOsama Bin Laden]/anybody.

Osama Bin Laden: I am going to bomb 'mericans again.
'bama: If i had an eye on my dick, i'd see inside your mouth.

If i had an eye on my dick, i'd see inside your mouth by Tyranosaurus Alan March 25, 2010