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Guildford 

Actually quite a good city. Has pretty much everything you need, and it's small enough to get to know your local chinese/chip shop guy. Plenty of things to do, and fun things too (gasp what a surprise). Don't believe what the other guy said about it, I've gotten far enough to afford broadband and a decent computer. And send my kids to private school. His definition is here Guilford. Really, you can't slag a place off if you can't spell it properly!
You wanna hit the clubs in Guildford?
Ahh, I went to the Guildford Spectrum the other day. Was good.
You know, Guildford is actually a city.
Zomg, that other guy spelt Guildford wrong.
Guildford by Charles Mann May 15, 2006
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Guildford 

The English, and better way of spelling "Guilford". For some reason just because it has a silent d in it, the American's felt the need to take it out when they named that town near North Carolina... Anyway...
Guildford is a city near Woking, in England... People say Guildford is better, but Woking is now catching up.
Guildford has an impressive cathedral amongst other things, such as a good ice hockey team (or so they say), a fairly good college and just generally good shopping facilities.
It is also a good place to go "emo" spotting... At weekends, you will often find gangs of these so-called emos hanging around at certain places throughout the city. It is a wonderful place to waste time and is often a treat for the eyes! If you're into that sort of thing.
Vanessa: Let's go to Guildford and have a gander at the delectable emo boys...

Me: Ooh, okay!
Guildford by Dwergi May 21, 2006

Guildford 

Lovely Town (yes it's a town NOT a city, like number 1 suggests, twat.) with lots of ladies with lovely titties.
Man 1: Hey Man, where are you from?
Man 2: Hey there, i'm from Guildford.
Man 1: Oh I hear it's not actually a city but a town with loads of fit chicks with lovely titties?'
Man 2: 'true'
Guildford by Guildford Phil June 2, 2011

Guildford Grammar School 

A school which had a headmaster who dipped faster than the Italians did from the Axis
Guildford Grammar School, oh yeah, Stevman Weebdoh can shove a dildo up his arse

guildford bearded lady 

A living legend resident in the Surrey town of Guildford. She is often seen sitting on benches in a leopard print coat. She has long flowing white hair which matches her similarly long flowing white beard. She allegedly eats children but as of yet there is no solid evidence.
Tourist: Holy shit it's a woman with a beard!!
You: No thats the Guildford bearded lady you disrespectful fuck.
Tourist: Oh my god!! Where's my baby gone?!
guildford bearded lady by Vince September 27, 2004

Guildford Grammar School 

A school located near the central outback of Western Australia. Commonly known as 'the farm', Guildford Grammar has a high reputation as being an outdoor paddock with stray horses roaming around playing fields. The school is hard to distinguish and has been thought of as a haystack many a time.
P1: Look at that horse"
P2: Thats one of the GGS teachers!!!"

P1: I believe we're lost. wait, the sign says Guildford Grammar School"
P2: Looks like an abandoned haystack to me..."

Guildford Grammar School 

Guildford Grammar, A previously co-ed school, turned all boy school. However, after many years of not getting pussy they decided to go back to co-ed. Unfortunately no girl wants to go to school on a farm full of pigs so, they only have a few dozen in each year level. The boys at Guildford are often described as having nearly as much intelligence as a first generation caveman, they often react to banter situations with aggression and take every comment to the cold black thing they call a heart. Guildford boys often like to prey on the girls of the school, making questionable comments and sexually harassing them. The school is most well known for failing in the sport, academic, music and art part of education however, they excel in being pricks. The average Guildford guy is a fuckboy who likes to ask girls for nudes and videos of them masturbating. Yet, whilst they still do this you will more then often see the boys get hard to each other in the change rooms. A Guildford boy is your basic faggot who tries so, so hard to act straight. The girls are alright, they just need to move to somewhere better and hopefully get good therapy help after the horrors they experienced whilst there.
See that guy wanking over there? Must go to Guildford Grammar School.

Who came last in the Head Of The River? Guildford Grammar School of course!

What is that school again that's in the PSA but no one cares about? Oh yeah! Guildford Grammar School!