Skip to main content

cockpush 

The exact opposite of the dreaded cockblock. This is when your buddy seriously does you a solid towards gettin' some.

This is not to be confused with the general duties of a good wingman. This is when your buddy has earned himself a freakin' Purple Heart of Wingmanship by showing extraordinary bravery in helping you score.

Sitting on the grenade (ie taking the ugly one home) in its most extreme cases (like, a 500 pounder) qualifies as a cockpush
-Hey man, so I'm gonna take Heather home so Leanne is all yours. Also, I managed to score you a 5 star suite upstairs with all inclusive room service. Happy trails!
-Dude...*chokes up* thank you for the epic cockpush
cockpush by Archit April 5, 2008
cockpush mug front
Get the cockpush mug.
See more merch

clockpush 

n. A single person or group of people who waste time.
That guy has been sitting in that chair for two hours, he is such a clockpush.
clockpush by gCw V April 6, 2008

cock push ups 

Its where you fucking lay down flat on the ground and let your boner lift you up off the ground. It may seem impossible at first, that your cock can't support your whole weight, but over time it can. you can only really do one, but one is all you need. This helps you get ready for when you become attractive to the ladies.
KG: Do you think that um, do you think that when the album, when this is out...
JB: Yeah?
KG: Do you think it will make us um, more attractive to the ladies?
JB: Pshh, yeah, in fact, I been getting ready.
KG: Yeah?
JB: Yeah, I been doin cock pushups.
KG: Cock Pushups?
JB: Yeah.
KG: What are those?
JB: Its where you fuckin lay down flat on the ground.
KG: Yeah...
JB: And then you let your boner lift you up off the ground.
KG: N...no, that's, that'd be impossible. Your cock can support your whole
weight?
JB: Well not at first...
KG: Yeah?
JB: But over time.
KG: Hmm...how many pushups can you do?
JB: ...cock pushups?
KG: Yeah...I guess, you could only do one really.
JB: Yeah, well one is all ya need

-Tenacious D's skit "Cock Pushups"
cock push ups by The General June 3, 2004

cock push-up 

when you lay on the ground and let your boner lift you up.
guy 1: wtf? get your lazy ass off the floor!
guy 2: i'm doing cock push-ups! give me a second and turn the porn back on!
cock push-up by KaylinOWNSYOU March 28, 2007

cockpushups 

Its were u fuckin lay down flat on the ground and then u let ur boner lift u up off the ground
Ive been doin cockpushups
cockpushups by Chris B. February 3, 2005
When you masturbate so hard your penis turns

flaccid and to mush.
Yo Dude I had a tug until I got cockmush last night.

cock push up 

where you lay flat on your chest on the ground, enjoy yourself and allow yourself to enlarge your penis. Then you pick yourself up with your boner, much like a push up
alex: i did 400 cock push ups last weak
ted: you must be tired
alex: are you kidding me?! my cock can go on your hours
cock push up by nud ronoc January 31, 2005