The amount of time required to complete a task one has failed to complete, and is being scolded about.
Teacher: Why can't you write your name legibly on your tests? It only takes Two Seconds to write your name.

Boyfriend: Why can't you hurry up and finish? I'm sitting here banging it out, and you can't take Two Seconds to finish?
by suecra13 November 9, 2011
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A crap that takes only a couple of seconds to take; shoots out like a rocket; comes out very smoothly... A SHIT THAT IS UNIQUE BECAUSE WHEN YOUR ASS IS WIPED, THERE IS NO SHIT ON THE TOILET PAPER; A COMPLETELY CLEAN SHIT.
"oh man, i only like taking a shit if its a two second slider- otherwise, i feel dirty when i wipe..."


by jennifer nasherson December 8, 2008
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Quickly, in a hurry, pronto, hasty, fast, etc.
Relax, just wait, I'll be at your house fucking two second style.
by JhEf January 31, 2009
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When a guy is receiving a hand job (usually a Light Bulb HJ) and he cums within roughly two seconds.
Man, I'm a Jewish girl named Steph, and I gave that guy a Light Bulb HJ last night, and he was definitely a Two Second Dave
by Luke R April 14, 2008
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The universally way of knowing that you're fucked. Popularized by celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay.
by ohhistevie April 7, 2018
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the act one gives when wanting you to chill out either becuase you want to go or him to shut up when he is telling a gay story he wants to keep saying
ramzy, hury the fuck up lets go

two seconds bro

shut the fuck up and get in the car.
by GTS February 28, 2004
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The fact that anyone weaker than you wouldn't last two seconds in jersey.
Hey Billy whats wrong?", "My mom just passed away....".,"You wouldn't last Two Seconds In Jersey.
by Bmilllz April 28, 2011
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