To commemorate a past event, you kill and eat an animal. It's a ritual sacrifice. With pie.
Thanksgiving isn't about blending of two cultures. It's about one culture wiping out another. And then they make animated specials about the part with the maize and the big belt buckles. They don't show you the next scene, where all the bison die and Squanto takes a musket ball in the stomach.
by Frankie1969 August 19, 2012
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a day we commemorate taking advantage of the "indians" by stealing their land, food, and lifestyles in exchange for cheap trinkets.
Ahh thanksgiving, lets give thanks to those indians for letting us screw them wholeheartedly.
by Chinese Jew November 27, 2003
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On Halloween:
Turkey 1: Say Joe have you heard the ghost story about "Thanksgiving"?
Turkey 2: No, what happens?
Turkey 1: Every year, on the same day, millions of Turkeys get their heads chopped off and then get eaten!
Turkey 2: Holy cow! Lucky it's just a ghost story.
by MatthewCHK November 26, 2007
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A mind-fucking holiday in which we take part eating the only animal that gobbles (That I know of), and commemorate our first contact with the real Americans (Before we made them our bitches).
"Happy Thanksgiving!"
-"Dude, I don't celebrate Thanksgiving."
"Why not?"
-"Why the fuck do you?!"
by Wang Lung Ho November 26, 2010
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Sean smoked four bowls and then went to thanksgiving dinner.
He ate four plates of mashed potatoes.
Then he killed a pumpkin pie.
You go sean. You go.
by craYYYzay November 19, 2010
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In America, it is the only day of the year where it is guaranteed that almost every person within a 2,000-mile radius of you is eating the same exact meal at the exact same time.
Hey, Jim! What are you guys eating tonight?

Oh, you know, just having some Turkey.

No, way! That's what we're having tonight!

Oh, man that's sick! My neighbors down the block are having Turkey for dinner too!

Oh my God so are mine!!!

Let's be best friends!

Err... Happy Thanksgiving, Jim.
by BCB5 November 23, 2017
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In 1621 A time where puritan pilgrims with pointy black leprechaun hats and Native indian americans joined together to have a feast of food to thank god for the blessings. Nowadays, fattening everyday american food, (like battered god knows what) is eaten to thank Colonel sanders for kfc and cholesterol.
Dude we should totally go to KFC for Thanksgiving!

Please dont take this as an offence/insult americans, this is partly ment to be a joke.
by geminitwins22 November 26, 2014
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