Oh Tom you white faggot icant drink this shit coffee its actually piss
by Datmemeguy April 8, 2018
when you drink a lot of coffee on an empty stomach, and then in about an hour or so you have to shit
Yo dude, i went to dunkies this morning, had a few medium regulars, and then all throughout the day i had the coffee shits
by MSHiggins December 10, 2008
After drinking coffee and eating tons of carbs then running you take a fiery, steamy, burning hot shit with a fudge-like consistency. It usually happens within an hour of coffee, with a smell similar to dead people, shit, and coffee combined. Even worse, it strikes without warning for the next hour leaving your pants in a shit covered hell.
Guy A "I love drinking coffee then eating pasta then running! Don't you?"
Guy B "Dude, your gonna get coffee shits..."
Guy A "Naa, I've got a colon of steel I...I need to change..."
by Dr. mcjesus100 March 29, 2010
When you replace breakfast with two cups of coffee, and then have the shits an hour later.

Coffee shits are usually ungodly smelling, hurt like crazy, have the consistency of oatmeal, and leave you feeling horrible and very hungry.
You're so gonna get coffee shits later.
by HeavyKitty November 30, 2010
the urgent daily ritual of emptying one’s bowel after two cups of the magic morning liquid.
I just finished my second cup and I really need to take a coffee shit right fucking now
by Vesla June 26, 2022
What you get after drinking too much coffee. Have fun screaming in the stall for four hours.
Guy one: Hey did you see bill?
Guy two: Oh yeah, he almost shit himself. I hear he collapsed in public.
Guy one: Yeah, sounds pretty awful.
Guy three: Obviously the coffee shits.
by Whitetrashyt September 25, 2017