Skip to main content

Monkey Branching 

Getting your next relationship set up before dumping your current S/O. Generally involves cheating (at least emotionally) on your current partner with the intended future partner. Refers to playing on the monkeybars, where you don't let go of the first bar until you've grabbed on the second.
Bill: "Well, your brother just sent the Save The Dates for his third marriage - they haven't even finalized the divorce yet!"

Joe: "Yeah, the monkey branching SOB did the same for his second marriage as well - all his relationships 'overlap,' if ya know what I mean."

OR

Joe: "Sue and I decided to try an open relationship."

Bill: "I dunno, sounds like she's monkey branching to her *next* relationship."
Monkey Branching by Mai Ainsel March 25, 2022
Word of the Day on May 3, 2024
Words you can keep

Monkey Branching 

when a girl already has a boyfriend but she gives her number to guys that she meets and flirts as if she were single. she's basically branching off from her boyfriend and establishing backups.
yo dude I saw your girl at starbucks giving her number to some guy. I don't think she saw me. it looks like she's monkey branching, you should dump her.
Monkey Branching by soulblk4000 December 2, 2010

Monkey Branching 

Not letting go of one thing before you seek or reach for another thing. It usually applies to relationships but some people do it at the dinner table and some do it when they think their means of income is insecure.

...Keeping in mind this is part of how monkeys survive...
Since polyamoury is not officially recognized and since people do the bare minimum for even themselves, I gueas thise of us who want a whole or interesting relationship are left to do some Monkey Branching to see if the next relationship contestant is more of a winner
Monkey Branching by T3CHN0F03B October 13, 2022
More from Urban Dictionary

Satellite baddies

Attractive women who are far from your location.
There are no hot girls in the area, theres only satellite baddies.
Satellite baddies by Banksy123 September 5, 2026
Word of the Day on September 10, 2026
Omg, the ramifications!”
-“You forgot about the rammys, bro.”
Rammys by Brandonmical August 4, 2023
Word of the Day on September 9, 2026

Failure Shower 

When you fail at something in life (eg. failing an exam or not getting a job), go home and spend an hour just standing in the shower, propping yourself up against the wall with your eyes on your feet.
Caleb knew the only thing to do after he didnt get prefect was take a failure shower.
Failure Shower by Vikingnz October 27, 2009
Word of the Day on September 8, 2026
Acronym for Non-Athletic Regular Person. Your schools lacrosse team probably shouts it at you while you walk by.
Lookie at these bunch of narps, NARP NARP NARP
NARP by Douchebag McKenzy March 31, 2010
Word of the Day on September 7, 2026
Next