by dick_pisser_765 March 26, 2021
This is the plan you make when you have limited time to jerk it. Especially applicable when someone living with you may return at any moment, or could walk in on you. Its having the cursor over the x , having something to cover your junk quickly, having another tab to click to etc. How to cover up the fact you were j-ing off quickly if someone were to come in.
Bro my girl was supposed to be gone all day and she came back early and caught me beating my meat. I fucked up not having a masturbation escape plan.
by Mcgwicko August 31, 2022
The very essence of UBC Computer Science professors. Unfortunately this disorder passes onto its top students as well.
You need to pay each of the masturbation professors a total whopping sum of 1 million dollars per course per term as they masturbate on both the male and female instagram profiles of their students and talk incoherently in lectures just to pass time and disorient their prey.
by MatrixEnergeticWar September 10, 2023
by IDK BUT YOUR MUM IS GAY November 21, 2022
The act of thinking, discussing, and/or philosophizing to no one’s spiritual, mental, or physical benefit, but purely for the sake of one’s own pleasure, intellectual self-satisfaction, and/or pride.
Note: Not all intellectual and philosophical discussion is intellectual masturbation, it only falls under the definition when it doesn’t benefit those in engaged in it, only harms due to wasted time and an artificial satisfaction in one’s self.
Note: Not all intellectual and philosophical discussion is intellectual masturbation, it only falls under the definition when it doesn’t benefit those in engaged in it, only harms due to wasted time and an artificial satisfaction in one’s self.
I remember when all I would do was engage in intellectual masturbation on Discord. I would use fancy words and blabber all day about philosophy, without actually applying it in any way whatsoever. I just derived pleasure from hearing myself speak about such abstract and complex subjects. What a fool I was.
by Tea76Crumpets796 October 1, 2022
When you and a partner agree not to masturbate until a certain date but they do it anyway and make you aware of them breaking the promise.
by Spittingstraightfacts January 2, 2020
Religious Masturbation.
Speaking about the supposed superiority of your religion, for the sole pleasure of listening to yourself and showing off to other members of that religion.
A religious leader preaching to the saved
Etymology: the religious counterpart to masturbation; i.e. a process that is very pleasurable but doesn’t accomplish anything in the end.
Speaking about the supposed superiority of your religion, for the sole pleasure of listening to yourself and showing off to other members of that religion.
A religious leader preaching to the saved
Etymology: the religious counterpart to masturbation; i.e. a process that is very pleasurable but doesn’t accomplish anything in the end.
The preacher gave a nice example of religious masturbation; a preaching about conversion to the saved
by Lyreluthier October 15, 2019