A 17 year old who smokes crack, wants to be a cop and has a Freddie Mercury Fetish. Allegedly Masturbating to Bohemian Rapsody 14.5 times in a day. Also he believes he is the next David Beckham but had to get air lifted to Rochester Mayo because his ankles got shattered when playing soccer.
Subject 1: Dude that kid looks like he is on crack
Subject 2: Yeah Nigga that John Balfanz
by ballsdeepinyoursister October 10, 2019
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Update on John he is now the number one drug kingpin. He sells to a diverse crowd of people all over the world. Even your 8 year old son. John has a distinct smell to him his girlfriend could not resist(weed,liquor,meth,starting fluid). But John has made a huge change in his life and now probably just finished in your mom.
John Balfanz will win the 2020 Nobel peace prize
by ballsdeepinyoursister May 2, 2020
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John finally graduated high school and is now going off to knee on “innocent” black peoples necks while working for the Alexandria Police Department. But John cant lay off the drugs sadly died at the age of 33 by overdosing on prescription painkillers cause he blew his back out fucking all the cougars at a Moltey Crüe concert.
Rest In Peace John Balfanz say hello to Hitler for me please
by ballsdeepinyoursister July 2, 2021
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