A Jack moment is when you have an incredibly easy putt/hit, but because you are getting over par your pride persuades you to full force your ball into the nearest out of bounds zone in dramatic display of childish incompetence.
Person A: All my boys out here are cracked at golf.
Person B: Nah dude, Kyle is having a Jack moment cause he went over par.
Cigarette: Northern slang for a cigarette, used oft by mashed up mancunian ravers becasue of the resemblance of a hot(electric)stove to the end of a lit cigarette. Originated circa 1991 in the early halcyon days of the rave culture; we speculate during a drug fuelled hallucination by said manc.
'fuck me noel, i am bolloxed, is that a ciggy in your mouth, or the stove from me 'nans kitchen'/
General use: 'Give us a stove you cunt'