An absolute sped.
Michael Helfin is a 4'2" redneck that lives in a trailer park in Inwood, West Virginia. He sits around all day jerking off in his moms shampoo bottle and then makes fake screenshots up saying he got a handjob. He smokes oregano and fucks his mom all day.
Michael - "Doodle you fat bitch I hit more bills then you"
Doodle - "You're Michael Heflin...automatic L"
by FatDoodlePuff May 8, 2019
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A rural area in Alabama near the GA line, full of hicks and pregnant teenagers. The most exciting time of the year is summer and fall (for football season). You're not allowed to date outside your race unless you're a risk taker and is fine with being disowned from your family. Most guys dip. And girls are either whores or good little Christian girls (whores in disguised).
In Heflin, Alabama, the only exciting thing to do is walking around.
by Pink Money <3 September 18, 2012
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I was walking to lunch when I walked by an especially loud Team Heflin.
by Mr. Zangoose March 19, 2011
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When you shave and you miss an entire area without noticing until you go to work the next morning.
Oh shit I have a Heflin after a fifth of Bookers at the exec meeting on Monday morning
by Whoflugpoo June 19, 2018
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