BRHS is a large
high school of well over 2,000 students located on 600 Garretson Road, Bridgewater, New
Jersey. The school is known for many things, other than the student'
s athletic, extra-curricular, and academic achievements:
1. A largely homogenized group of students. Other than a few outliers, most students are
white, upper-middle class to upper class students who only wear clothing from Abercrombie & Fitch,
Hollister, or American Eagle. Students cherish the belief that wearing North Face backpacks and jackets will project an image of wealth and status. And to that point, many choose to drive specific cars to produce a similar effect.
3. Whores. Many of them. BRHS has the unique distinction of being one of the most slutastic educational institutions in the area. The most notorious example of this can be found in the winter, when a sizable number of the student population chooses to wear miniskirts, despite the below-freezing temperatures
3. A completely ridiculous arrangement of the buildings. Supposedly designed by a Californian architect (who was, undoubtedly, on crack when he set up the buildings), BRHS is organized into ten separate buildings, mostly according to subject, which causes students to be forced to brave the
snow and harsh weather of New
Jersey, many of them, as previously noted, in miniskirts.
4. A laughably
bad football team and mostly unattractive cheerleaders. The fortunate aspect of this, however, is that none of the students pay attention to the football team. The unfortunate aspect of this is that the school demands the presence of its students during inane pep rallies.
5. Kids that opt either to come to school high or trade their drugs at school. Either way, the staff and faculty largely ignore the drugs and everybody lives in peaceful harmony. Infamously, a teacher was arrested last year in a drug bust.
6. Often plagued by budget-defeats, BRHS chooses to spend its money wisely. For example, a couple years ago, BRHS choose to spend several hundreds of thousands of dollars to reface the turf of the football field.
7. After being excluded from a place in the
top 75 high schools in some obscure magazine that nobody reads (NJ monthly), a very defensive letter from the administration attempted to convince BRHS
parents that the ranking system was a flawed system. I mean, come on, SOMERVILLE
High School was ranked high than us, the ranking must be
whack. Oddly, no critique of Newsweek'
s ranking system was issued after it named BRHS among the
top in the country. Rather, it was proudly promoted on BRHS'
s main website, funny...
