Booze Pig

Booze Pig is the leader and envy of a pack of Booze Hounds. Booze Pig has the all of the qualities of a Booze Hound which are: social competency despite vast booze consumption and the ability to find any reason to booze. These additional qualities are what make a Booze Pig: immunity to hangovers, the ability to turn those around them into Booze Hounds, and the ability to time travel. Booze Pig will lead the Booze Hounds through a night/day of boozing, and be the only one to show up for a fully productive workday on time. They will have no memory of the prior night/day of boozing hence the ability to time travel. Nor will they be hurting from all of the booze. They only time a Booze Pig suffers is if they didn't booze made apparent through shaky hands and complaints about how thirsty they are.

10:00 AM
FNG: "Man, I am hungover today. Feel like shit."
FOG: "Is that why you are late? It's Tuesday! What was the occasion?"
FNG: "Nothing. The Boss invited me and a few other people for dinner. Didn't realize the Boss drinks his dinner! He must be fucked up."
FOG: "Nope, he was here early for a 6:00 AM meeting."

11:00 AM
Boss: "Who are you?"
FNG: "I am the FNG. You invited me over for dinner."
Boss: "I did...? Oh you are?...You should come over again! See you later!" (leaves)
FNG: "Damn, my liver won't survive working here. The Boss is a Booze Pig!"

Booze Pig by Another FNG December 29, 2009