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Turtle golf

The art of loosing a golf ball, in a water hazard, while playing for money and miraculously finding it when no one is looking.
No fucking way he got a par!!
He straight Turtle golf’d It!
by Neverlostaballever August 30, 2018
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Turtle Parade

A non trivial sized line of men at Bathroom or Portable toilet that seemingly all need to poop urgently
I was at the football game and there was a massive Turtle Parade because there was only 1 porta jon.
by Mr. Pix September 21, 2018
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Turtle Shock

When you fuck your girl turtle style and she can't walk for 24 Hours
by LAGOUT July 20, 2019
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Turtle-bite

When a man is peeing and he pinches his balls in his belt buckle but cannot remove them straight away because if he does he will end up missin the bowl and pissin everywhere. He just has to endure the pain until his piss is over.
I just got a heavy turtle-bite over behind those bushes. Ow, fuck!
by Crackpotslingshot May 14, 2019
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Turtle cake

A Turtle Cake is when a man has a small penis that is also uncircumcised that resembles a frightened turtle and is put between the ass cheeks of an unsuspecting victim, thus the turtle is between the cakes.
I would love to give her a turtle cake while she’s not looking.
by River.01 March 4, 2019
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Turtle Tears

An insincere display of sorrowful emotion.
The little girl shed turtle tears as she hoped her angry mother would not scold her for jumping on the bed.
by Meowmix789 October 24, 2017
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Turtle porn

Mickey: " how is Tyler's dick game?"

Heaven:"It's like turtle porn, slow and boring"
by Grumpup March 23, 2017
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