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The absolute most catastrophic event in the Earth's history, should it happen.

The BBC will send out an emergency broadcast alert, all motorways in the UK will be shut apart from emergency services and military personnel. Southampton will be relegated to the Championship, Pareth Pouthgate will sign a new contract with England, Tesco will stop its £3.50 meal deal, Alex Turner will no longer want to be part of The Strokes, an asteroid will be on a crash collision course with Earth and nothing can be done about it, Pisstiano Penaldo and Parry Pane will both score hattricks against Southampton, Portsmouth will win the Caribou cup again, Bluestar Bus will stop its £1 fares after 6PM, Domino's will no longer do Two for Tuesday, Pizza Hut will stop its £5 favourites, Papa Johns will stop its £8.99 large pizza collection deal, Virgin Media will go out of business, the sale of Elf Bar vapes will be banned in the UK, the servers for Call of Duty World at War will shut down, labour will lose the next general election. These aren't all the events that will happen and just the ones I have on the top of my head...
Spack No.2:MUUUUUUUUM! JACK'S SPANKING AGAIN!

Rishi Sunak or who ever the fuck is PM at the time: "You must ration all essential supplies now and limit outside contact"
by Jack Spank9049 July 30, 2022
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crank it and spank it

When used in business: wrap it up and get on with the task.

Note: if you have an HR department you should not use this phrase in business.
Okay team, let’s crank it and spank it!”
by Shh shh shh August 1, 2022
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Spanks Hank

The modern term created for thank you. It was created by an Oregon Insurance Agent who created a typo in an email to another agent but birthed a new word. The spanks hank. You smack it in the end of your email when you want to say thank you but hit your recipient with a confusion.
Hi Mark, I received for the documents.
Spanks hank.
by Turbulentcucumber August 3, 2022
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Mozzarella Spank

Slamming the bag of frozen grated cheese with gusto in a sexual manner to loosen it up and help thaw. Use of kneading the firm frozen cheese to make it smooth and ready for topping.

.
My girlfriend has been distant lately and she often needs a mozzarella spank to get into the mood.
by ThatguySmiitty August 7, 2022
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Spank

“Bro waxing 200 a spank
by Half booty to a spank August 8, 2022
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spank

bum pr bam
babies get bams on bum or spank for being naughty.
by prooshil August 19, 2022
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Spank

"Bouncing out and spank it til its empty cause its fun to me"
by Bluestrips August 31, 2022
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