Flu

The flu is the hurtful and shity but effective way to get out of going to school

mom:wake up we are going to school
kid:i have the flu and feel like absolute shit help me
mom: you’ll be fine

by JohnnyBlu3 November 25, 2019

Man flu

The man flu is where a dude will feel under the weather for a few hours/half the day after sitting outside in the cold for hours while smoking half a pack of cigarettes, some weed, and drinking jack Daniels. The man flu is also having a sinus headache.........that’s it. The man flu is a serious illness that should be announced to all and taken seriously. The man flu has no actual symptoms, when confronted about the man flu it can only be described as “ feeling really sick”. There is no cure for man flu.

My husband has the man flu. He has the sniffles and has dramatically thrown himself on the couch and called out of work.

by wastecase November 28, 2019

24 hour neck flu

When your neck is so sore that you cant go to work but really you've just been up all night partying.

Sir, I cant come in to work tomorrow. I have the 24 hour neck flu.

by frogdoggie March 21, 2019

cochella flu

the sickness everyone gets after coachella because they probably inhaled WAY too much dust.

damn that cochella flu gets me every year

by riding til i can’t no more April 21, 2019

Half-flu

cold symptoms minus the snot

Carl is working from home today as he has half-flu

by efsquared May 7, 2019

Murray Flu

A pussy ass bitch that uses excuses to get out of a few pints

That cunt has the Murray Flu

by KayTwoKay December 23, 2019

The Fischer Flu

After having two beers, you act and pretend to be the best coil tuber on planet earth and proceed to act like a jive turkey. It acts as one of the strongest women repellents know to man

A complete tomato head who smokes 2 packs of cigarettes a day; a real disgusting individual

Bundy: I used to rig in and frac all by myself

Co-worker: oh man, he’s got the Fischer flu

by The chrome donkey August 2, 2019