Chicago Bears Tax

A mysterious curse where any football player who signs with the Chicago Bears immediately forgets how to play football. Scientists estimate a 75% drop in skill the second the pen hits the contract. Side effects include dropped passes, missed tackles, and uncontrollable crying at Soldier Field.

Man, he was a Pro Bowler last year. Now? Looks like he paid the Chicago Bears Tax.

by 34344444 September 7, 2025

Chicago

A Chicago is the most glorious thing to ever step foot on earth. He is the epitome of power. He controls all. If you meet someone named chicago, bend down and bow.

He is my king, he is Chicago

by BestBakakakakaka January 20, 2024

Chicago Blackhawks

Chicago Blackhawks the "best team in the league" win some Stanley Cups then come close to last in the league trade a player to the Winnipeg Jets and get him back a few years later then trade him again the the NY Islanders. The team that lost to both the Colarado Avalanche and the Arizona Coyotes just in just 2 week! Oh I can't forget loosing in the first round by the team that was ranked 16th in the playoffs and lost the round 4-1 and scored 2 goals.

Chicago Blackhawks meaning: When a team chokes twice in the playoffs in 2 years and only scores 12- Goals in 2 Playoffs

by Gardener That Loves Crib February 18, 2018

Chicago Stir-Fry

Boiling completely liquid diarrhea in a croc pot and using it as a popular Chicago substitute for gravy. Often seasoned with smegma or red pepper flakes flakes

Billy: yo Tony can I get a little chicago stir-fry on my dog?

Tony: Tell when to stop pouring billy!

by OfficiallyDrDubious May 10, 2025

Chicago Oyster

What comes out of your nose after doing large amounts of cocaine for an extended period of time.

Man, Smitty served up Chicago oysters all over that hotel room in Atlantic City.

by jaybronee October 10, 2020

Chicago Chili Bucket

When you put a person into a deep hole and take turns shitting into the hole until they drown

“Did you hear Geoff fell into a hole?”
“Oh no, they’re going to make him into a Chicago chili bucket”

by Syntex March 5, 2024

Chicago Snowblower

A sexual act where, at the conclusion of sex, a male ejaculates violently and excessively somewhere in the room, recreating a snowblower blowing snow. The semen is left in place for several weeks until it starts to smell and stinks up the entire room, much like how the entire city of Chicago smells awful.

"I gave Becky the good ol' Chicago Snowblower a few weeks ago and man, does my bedroom smell like shit!"

by femboydestroyer4960 September 12, 2024