Cock Wagging (noun):
An ancient and totally unnecessary ritual where Homo Arroganticus feels compelled to flaunt their perceived superiority, achievements, or Instagram followers. Practiced by both men and women alike, it usually involves subtle tactics like flexing in a reflective surface, name-dropping, or loudly explaining Bitcoin to people who didn’t ask.
Side effects may include:
Eye rolling in nearby humans
Spontaneous allergic reactions to humility
And the mysterious vanishing of friends mid-conversation
An ancient and totally unnecessary ritual where Homo Arroganticus feels compelled to flaunt their perceived superiority, achievements, or Instagram followers. Practiced by both men and women alike, it usually involves subtle tactics like flexing in a reflective surface, name-dropping, or loudly explaining Bitcoin to people who didn’t ask.
Side effects may include:
Eye rolling in nearby humans
Spontaneous allergic reactions to humility
And the mysterious vanishing of friends mid-conversation
Alex: “So I told Elon I’d only invest if I got equity and a Tesla Plaid…”
Jamie: “Dude. Stop cock wagging. We’re at a baby shower.”
Jamie: “Dude. Stop cock wagging. We’re at a baby shower.”
by Mechmonkey64bit May 2, 2025
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