DUMPTY HUMPTY BUMPTY RUMPTY AAAa
by Kirbo the man September 26, 2019
This wonderful event starts out with a man sitting on a wall to show off his crotch to a woman he has a crush on. To show the woman that he is mating material, he will hump the wall in hopes of moistening her lady garden. However, he does not realize that humping the hard wall will stimulate his spinky and cause a great fall... of shit. The poopy will land below on the woman, and all hopes of mating will be crushed.
Tyrant: Yo boss, happy Friday. Any fun plans for the weekend?
The Boss: Yea I was gonna go to the Meat Market tonight for some juicy Italian sausage, but I accidentally Humpty-Dumptied my wife last night and I gotta make it up to her.
Tyrant: Bro... you’re gonna have to explain this one.
The Boss: Okay.. so I hopped on our little wall between our living room and kitchen and figured I would try to turn her on. Turns out.. I only turned on my shit wagon and inadvertently plopped a log right on her dome. Safe to say I won’t be getting dome for a while.
Tyrant: Damn dude I’m so sorry to hear that. Hope she doesn’t get POO-TSD from that. Next time wear your Shitbit, as it would’ve warned you that logs were a brewin’.
The Boss: Yea I was gonna go to the Meat Market tonight for some juicy Italian sausage, but I accidentally Humpty-Dumptied my wife last night and I gotta make it up to her.
Tyrant: Bro... you’re gonna have to explain this one.
The Boss: Okay.. so I hopped on our little wall between our living room and kitchen and figured I would try to turn her on. Turns out.. I only turned on my shit wagon and inadvertently plopped a log right on her dome. Safe to say I won’t be getting dome for a while.
Tyrant: Damn dude I’m so sorry to hear that. Hope she doesn’t get POO-TSD from that. Next time wear your Shitbit, as it would’ve warned you that logs were a brewin’.
by Stoney69 December 18, 2020
by Shum Egg October 24, 2023
by Cumpty Dumpty May 14, 2023
Also, "Dunkin' Brown." Fall onto one's own poop after excrement. First recorded in 2022, this term originally had the literal meaning of “dipping into poop.” The current everyday usage, however, transfers any physical fall to various kinds of poop or vomit.
As in Ryno dunkin' dumpty himself right after I let him out in the backyard, or I don't know what to do, Caleb just dunkin' browned himself in the bathroom.
by F. Jonas May 14, 2022
Dude #1: “Did you make it to the toilet in time?“
Dude #2: “Yeah, even had enough time to get naked. Took a real Comfy Dumpty.”
Dude #2: “Yeah, even had enough time to get naked. Took a real Comfy Dumpty.”
by thesundancekidx October 11, 2020
A dumpty is a sweet and calm animal (most likely a dog but could be a rabbit or a gremlin in disguise). Dumptys are the sweetest animals in the world and they never bite, bark, or shred things because they are so calm. Dumptys love their master and are protective. They protect the house during the week when they sleep in the living room and they get rewarded with cuddle time on weekends for their good work.
by JustCallMeCute August 07, 2016