constipated

1- When your shit is stuck up your ass hole, hoping it will finally let out.
2- Kinda feels like giving birth out of your ass.
3- Hurts like fuck.
4- If you push too hard, your head will blow up.
5- The total opposite of diarrhea.

James- "Holy fuck! My crap is like, stuck up my ass!"
Mom- "Really? How does it feel?"
James- "Like I'm giving birth to a brick!"
Mom- "Force harder then!"
James- "But my ass is gonna like, tear or something."
Mom- "Oh well, not my problem that you are constipated."

by Hitler (yes i am female) February 11, 2009

Wadsworth Constant

The Wadsworth Constant states that the first 30% of any YouTube video can be skipped as it is irrelevant.

Go to YouTube - pick any video and skip to 30%. Rewatch the whole video and see if the bit you missed at the beginning adds anything. If not the Wadsworth Constant is in action.

by GFEDCBA4321 October 2, 2011

word constipation

When a word or group of words is on the tip of your tongue, but you can't get them out.

Kyle: "Why aren't you talking?"
B.J.: "I'm suffering from a little bit of word constipation."

Kyle: "You still haven't said anything."
B.J.: "I'm word constipated, damnit!"

by bj and kk December 9, 2007

constant chimer

A person who constantly "chimes in" during a time when he or she has no business being in the conversation. This typically occurs when a person feels that they are being left out of the topic in discussion. In fear that the conversation will lead to other topics that they know absolutely nothing about, this person will say something everybody already knows to try and make oneself seem relevant to the conversation.

Kyle: "Yo man, I'm gettin' sick of these bitch-ass penalties being called every sunday."

Jason: "No kidding. On the reals, Goodell should be fir-"

Tim (Not only is he pulling an inappropriate chime, but hes cutting off the other person): "They are ruining the game!"

Jason: "No shit you dumbass. Why do you think we are talking about this in the first place? So put those two cents back in your pocket and shut the fuck up!"

Kyle: "Yeah man, you don't even watch football..Goddamn constant chimer."

by TheKidWithKnowledge December 7, 2010

constipatience

To become resigned to the fact that you won't be able to defecate until your colon decides it's ready to.

Patient: "I took the laxatives you gave me but I still haven't been able to go to the toilet."
Doctor: "Well, your bowel will evacuate when it's ready. You'll just have to learn constipatience."

by Matti! Matti! Matti! May 15, 2013

constipation hangover

When you still can't take a quality dump days after a heavy night of drinking.

...on a side note, your boy hasn't dropped a deuce since that Jack fucked me up on Sunday. This fucking constipation hangover is no joke at this point...

by LeDeau September 27, 2017

Romantically Constipated

Being entirely unable to engage romantically in a healthy fashion, either through the person's own fault, their own simple dislike of romantic relations, or the stupidity of their romantic choices. Most often, it is used to describe someone who leaves a relationship once things become more emotional. It can also describe someone who repeatedly engages in harmful romantic relationships, however.

You only left her because you started to feel something for her. That's what always happens with you - you're romantically constipated.

by hollyed January 3, 2011