Calgary is an essentially boring, lifeless city in Alberta, Canada with delusions of grandeur. One of the worst examples of urban sprawl in North America it's ecological footprint is massive. So much so that water is becoming a major issue. It is famous for the Calgary Stampede which is a drunken corporate boozefest designed to convince people that Calgary still has anything at all to do with Cowboys.
An essentially a white collar city obsessed with being " a world class city". It should be noted however, that inland cities are rarely world class. Having grown by more than 200,000 people in the last 20 many who come from other larger more cosmopolitan cities despise the fact that Calgary has no arts scene to speak of. The philharmonic teeters on bankruptcy every few years, and the jazz festival died a nasty death due to financial problems.
Calgary is a city, for the most part of hard workers and hard drinkers. Having one of the highest per capita alcohol consumption rates the standard problems arise. However, since most of Calgary is middle class, alcoholism & drug abuse are relabled conspicuous consumption.
Having lived in Calgary my whole life not being white has been a definite plus. It's great to have fun at the rednecks expense and they are usually shocked to discover a margin of education or a sharp wit.
On the subject of well bred white girls a lot of them do get fed up with the redneck attitudes of a lot of white guys. The basically means that if you're not white as long as your a decent man you can date any woman that you want. That being said a lot of girls in Calgary are gold diggers regardless of color. They will ask you in the first five minutes of meeting you, what you do, how much money you make and what you drive. Caution must be applied as a lot of these women are interested in what they can get out of the relationship, not in the man per se. Be vague in matters of money and things will go a lot better. They will be forced to be a little more creative in their legwork which only benifits you, as a guy.
Calgary is a city, for the most part of hard workers and hard drinkers. Having one of the highest per capita alcohol consumption rates the standard problems arise. However, since most of Calgary is middle class, alcoholism & drug abuse are relabled conspicuous consumption.
Having lived in Calgary my whole life not being white has been a definite plus. It's great to have fun at the rednecks expense and they are usually shocked to discover a margin of education or a sharp wit.
On the subject of well bred white girls a lot of them do get fed up with the redneck attitudes of a lot of white guys. The basically means that if you're not white as long as your a decent man you can date any woman that you want. That being said a lot of girls in Calgary are gold diggers regardless of color. They will ask you in the first five minutes of meeting you, what you do, how much money you make and what you drive. Caution must be applied as a lot of these women are interested in what they can get out of the relationship, not in the man per se. Be vague in matters of money and things will go a lot better. They will be forced to be a little more creative in their legwork which only benifits you, as a guy.
by 156 July 23, 2006
Get the Calgary mug.The laughingstock of Alberta. The have by far the dumbest fans in the NHL, who think the Shames are an NHL powerhouse despite the fact that they've went past the first round only once since 1989. They are one Kiprusoff away from a top ten draft pick. Their gap-toothed fans are either filthy, strech-marked gutterwhores or inbred mulletheads who live in a time where the Camaro is the epitome of high-class.
The Shames can't score to save their lives, and depend on their exciting combination of clutch-and-grab and depending on their goalie to be MVP every single game. A Battle of Alberta at the MaxipadDome includes Oilers fans invading that dump of an arena, and outcheering Shames fans in their own building. It's quite a spectacle!
Shames fans tend to make it through their day by convincing themselves that they are better than Edmonton. An inferiority complex is an ugly thing.
The Shames can't score to save their lives, and depend on their exciting combination of clutch-and-grab and depending on their goalie to be MVP every single game. A Battle of Alberta at the MaxipadDome includes Oilers fans invading that dump of an arena, and outcheering Shames fans in their own building. It's quite a spectacle!
Shames fans tend to make it through their day by convincing themselves that they are better than Edmonton. An inferiority complex is an ugly thing.
The Oilers are your daddy, and don't you forget it Mulletgary!
The Calgary Flames are synomynous with "Choke".
The Calgary Flames are synomynous with "Choke".
by Who;s your daddy? September 10, 2006
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A fucking awesome city, with the saddledome, Calgary tower (WITH A FUCKING AWESOME SEE THROUGH FLOORING!!), Legendary theaters, One Egyptian temple themed, and the other one is based on the roman coliseum. We have a PYRAMID shaped library thats genius. We have the stampede, globalfest, AWESOME malls , lots of hangouts, EVERYTHING, C.O.P., We should be The capital of the country because we are the fastest, richest growing city in all the fucking country.
Calgary Owns French Canada up the ass, and Edmonton.
Dude-1:"So what do you want to do today in Calgary?"
Dude-1:"I dunno there is to much to do!! *raging orgasm*"
Dude-1:"So what do you want to do today in Calgary?"
Dude-1:"I dunno there is to much to do!! *raging orgasm*"
by Your Mother's father's daughter's seventh son, of a seventh son. August 15, 2006
Get the calgary mug.A sterile, livable and modest Canadian city, with professional sports teams for entertainment. A stone's throw from the Rockies, but that doesn't actually affect the quality of the city.
It's not even close to a "world city", but Calgary has the most potential to grow of any Canadian city. With the oil economy, the imigrants are coming from across the globe and local art scenes will develop.
A city with some minority of fanatics that really like to insult Toronto for no apparent reason. But they are not the voice of the city.
It's not even close to a "world city", but Calgary has the most potential to grow of any Canadian city. With the oil economy, the imigrants are coming from across the globe and local art scenes will develop.
A city with some minority of fanatics that really like to insult Toronto for no apparent reason. But they are not the voice of the city.
Calgarian: "Fuck Toronto, those pakis and gangster wannabes can stay where they are. Calgary is so much better, we have the stampede."
Torontonian: "Calgary's pretty cool, I love Banff and the Rockies. Last time I was there I missed the stampede by a couple of days, and didn't really do anything memorable. Stop talking bullshit about my hometown! It's a lot more dynamic in the arts, dining, diversity and the neighbourhoods. If crime gets worse and the city becomes dirtier, I'll consider Calgary, but we've got some unique ideas. Watch out."
Calgarian: "I suppose I've never lived back east, I don't really know. Mind you, I don't have much to complain about either."
Torontonian: "Calgary's pretty cool, I love Banff and the Rockies. Last time I was there I missed the stampede by a couple of days, and didn't really do anything memorable. Stop talking bullshit about my hometown! It's a lot more dynamic in the arts, dining, diversity and the neighbourhoods. If crime gets worse and the city becomes dirtier, I'll consider Calgary, but we've got some unique ideas. Watch out."
Calgarian: "I suppose I've never lived back east, I don't really know. Mind you, I don't have much to complain about either."
by A.J.R. October 26, 2006
Get the calgary mug.A city in Alberta, Western Canada. A right-wing, oil-rich, poorly planned-out traffic jam that is run by faux-cowboy hicks who have lots of money but no idea how to spend it practically or efficiently. Calgary is the homeless capital of the world. There are so many bums downtown that they might actually constitute a voting block. Calgary is also the rape capital of Canada, sexual assaults on women being a favorite pastime for immigrants and locals alike. Calgary is also chock full of drug-gangs, grow-ops, and mentally-ill street codgers. The courts don't actually lock-up criminals, instead they let them out after 12 hours of cushy containment. Watch out for swarming immigrant teenagers who will beat the shit out of you for the fun of it. The hockey team sucks, too.
by WingSt. January 9, 2008
Get the Calgary mug.A pretentious city with delusions of grandeur and penis envy (Toronto's dick is way bigger). I equate Calgary to the farmboy redneck who just won the lottery and bought himself a new car, new clothes and a fancy house. You may look good, you may have money, but Calgary you still have no class or sophistication, because deep down you are still a redneck.
Gee wiz look at me, I am Calgary - a hip and cool place because of all that oil money that I dug up from the ground but didn't really have to use by brains or ingenuity to create. Shhh, please don't tell my master Toronto.
by Toronto the Great May 19, 2007
Get the Calgary mug.A city trying it's best to be as good as Toronto, Montreal, and Vancouver before it's oil runs out and it turns into Canada's first Detroit. Bunch of red neck wannabes walking around in their cowboy hats eating beef and fattening up like the grease pigs they are. In the middle of nowhere, only talked about because they have oil. To bad Alberta couldn't start drilling for class and style 2 things missing from this bubble soon to burst. Claim to be Canadian but act more like a bunch of racist whities from Texas. SUV loving, freeway driving, suburban dwelling, city sprawling, environment raping, meat swallowing, air polluting, cowboy riding, animal abusing bunch of Hillbillies.
Calgary is the biggest waste of time.
by CapatainWestward July 25, 2006
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