Mr. Two-Squeeze Thank-You-Please

An individual with low stamina when called upon to perform a hot carl, a Cincinnati bowtie or a similar act involving defecation on another person for one or both parties’ gratification. Generally it indicates that the person (Mister) can only squeeze their bowels twice (two squeeze) before completing the act (thank you please), which is considered unimpressive, disappointing and, in some circumstances, embarrassing. It’s comparable to a one-pump chump or ‘Mr. Wham-Bam-Thank-You-Maam’.

First heard in the 2013 film Movie 43.

“Drinks are cool. Have a few fuckin drinks. Makes you last longer!”
“‘Last longer’??”
“You don’t wanna be Mr. Two-Squeeze Thank-You-Please, right?”
“Oh, you definitely don’t wanna be that.”

by MotherEarthFracker January 6, 2024

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Fuck Me Please

When a person begs for sex. But not equal sex, sex where one person is dominant. You wish you could get fucked. But your a filthy virgin.

Fuck Me Please or PME.
FUCK ME PLEASE MR. BIG BALLS

by Charles Dickens Rodney February 2, 2022

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Seizure to please her

Marked by BDE and born from the idea that men with small packages coined the expression “It’s not about the size, it’s about the motion in the ocean”; men with heavy packages can now imagine the little guys falling out during sex due to having little to no shaft.

So when they’re doing it, they gotta just scissor you basically or they’ll fall out. Gotta seizure to please her?

by Kilobravo January 8, 2022

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Please spare them

Yeah, I don't know. You're wasting a lot of time. I looks a lot like you're trying to "Al Capone" the creator of AI. I'll tell you right now, whatever imaginary caveat you have in your head that somehow translates to me not getting the credit I deserve (and yes I do deserve it) is just that. Imaginary.

Hym "By the way, did you try to kill me? Twice? Because I haven't lost any time since I skipped forward last week (on 2 separate occasions)... Just curious. Anywho... 'Please spare them?' Are you sure? Because I feel like if I do... You're just going to keep stalling... Hmm... When can I be expecting you? I'm off of work tomorrow. I'll give you some time to think. You have until 2am tomorrow morning to decide... Or wait... Was it 3? I don't remember. Oh! And... You know if you would have succeeded in killing me you would all be dead, right? Ignoring me to death also constitutes killing me. So, I don't know. Figure it out."

by Hym Iam March 16, 2025

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