Cookie Monster

A famous children's TV show star, as well as the former lead singer of the death metal band Cannibal Corpse.

Despite being more known for the former, Cookie Monster was the original lead singer of the famed death metal band before they got signed. The main reason why Cookie Monster was kicked out of Cannibal Corpse was due to his addiction of the said baked goods in his name. Cookie Monster was caught sucking the dick of his fellow cast member on Sesame Street, Ernie for a bag of Chips Ahoy. The rest of his band caught him in the act, and fired him subsequently.

Cookie Monster went through a downhill spiral, using all the money he made on TV (being now kicked out of Cannibal Corpse) to go to the local Mr. Fields and buy all their inventory. Cookie Monster lost the lease on his gorgeous condominium in Martha's Vineyard, divorced his wife (who at the time was the then-irresistible 90's babe Alicia Silverstone), and was reduced to munching on his "sweets" in the back of his beaten-up 1972 Chevy El Camino. But one day, in the summer of 2001, Cookie Monster admitted himself into a rehab center in Palo Alto, California.
There he spent a long six years recovering from his habits of munching, grinding, snorting, and shooting up forms of his favorite baked good. At that time, the producers of Sesame Street hired a stunt double to take over Cookie's role on the show, but the double wasn't popular as he (the stunt double) said he enjoyed veggies as much as cookies. The real Cookie, though, did finally make it out of rehab (even after several fights with the personnel there--once at which resorting to being drugged up by employees after smuggling cookies into his room).

At long last, on August 21, 2007, the Cookie Monster was released from rehab and he was a changed man--sort of. He still only eats cookies, but at least he admits to not sucking a dick for one. The stunt double on Sesame Street continues to take Cookie's place so there's no production conflicts while the real Cookie Monster has recently recorded a guest appearance on a thrash metal track aptly named "Cookie Monster" with the band XTT (look it up on YouTube) and has been doing session recording with other metal acts. Rumors have spread that Cookie Monster is also appearing on a duet with Serj Tankian (vocalist of alt-metal band System of a Down) on the latter's next solo album. Cookie Monster now lives a quiet life with his current girlfriend and famous British singer Estelle in their quaint apartment in Leeds, United Kingdom.
by JimboWales August 20, 2010
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chunk monster

An individual who is somewhat large in size, due to a perceived excess of food and/or alcohol consumption. An insult.
"Look out, here comes the chunk monster!"
by Mr Ben February 07, 2005
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rice monster

Joke among fans of X Japan and/or drummer and pianist Yoshiki Hayashi. In a blog entry, Yoshiki, who at the time had been on a strict rice diet, claimed to have a nightmare about "the RICE MONSTER" attacking him.

The joke has no relation to either of the other two definitions, and most fans of Yoshiki telling the joke would be offended at either of them.
"The day before yesterday, in the airplane on the way to Japan, I had a really weird dream….. I almost….. Well, I think I screamed!! The flight attendant came to me and said "Are you OK? ....." Then I said "THE RICE MONSTER IS TRYING TO EAT ME!!!"….. And she said……. "WHAT????" and I said……mmmm……ah……. "Never mind……ah….. Could I have a glass of Champagne and Caviar please?"

……. OH MY GOD!!!..... "I am so embarrassed"….. I've been doing a "special diet" and training, in order for me to play drums even harder….. Since then "THE RICE MONSTER" has been showing up in my dreams. Ha ha ha ha ha!!!"

- from a 2007 blog by Yoshiki on Myspace, and the origin of the term's usage
by A Groupie January 03, 2010
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grog monster

An alchoholic.
*From grog, the old British Naval word for rum*
Look at him, he's a turning into a right old grog monster.
by dvarpala June 15, 2004
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monster dip

1. A gigantic dip(smokeless tobacco) placed behind the lip. 2. A large horseship dip.
Satanic Voice: Put in a ma ma ma monster dip dip dip(echo)
Jimmy: Why?
Satanic Voice: Real men eat rocks and shit gunpowder or put in ginormous dips.
Jimmy: I dont want to...
Satanic Voice: Then you will DIE DIE DIE(echo)!!!
by MonsterDipper88 September 27, 2007
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mayo monster

a stupid, ignorant, and probably racist white person
me: *notices friend crying*

friend: THAT STUPID FUCKING MAYO MONSTER CALLED ME A DUMB MONKEY WHORE
by thatbitchperiod October 22, 2019
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Monster cock

Trott: hey smith come with me to see Ross he's got some monster cock over at his apartment.
Smith: sure i haven't had my tea yet.
by Hulks_Raging_Boner August 03, 2015
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